I'll Find You... I Promise

Chapter 2

TW: Separation of Siblings, Forcing Someone into a Car, Trouble Breathing Due to Crying (not an anxiety attack per say)

"I'm not going!" Virgil screamed, stomping his foot on the ground as his fist swung slightly at his side. 

Ryan gave a quiet sigh as the owner of the group home, Martha, whom the brothers had been living in for the past six months gave a tense smile. "Virgil, it's okay. You're going to be great-"

"No! I'm not leaving without Janus! Y-you can't make me!" Well, that was a lie. Pretty much anybody could easily pluck Virgil off the ground and just carry him off if they really wanted to. Virgil wasn't exactly tall or heavy, he was just about four feet and skinny as a stick despite having more than healthy eating habits. He had pale skin that burned easily even in the winter when the sun wasn't out as much. His hair, much like his brother's, was black and curly though unlike his brother Virgil actually liked it long and it came down past his shoulders. He had two different colored eyes, one green and the other a dark blue. When he smiled, dimples would appear, and when he was especially excited he tended to close his eyes as he gave a short celebration.

"I didn't even like those stupid people!" Virgil stormed, "I hate them and they're boring and I don't want to go!" Another lie, after Virgil's interview with the couple Virgil had seemed ecstatic. For the first time in a while, Janus could see actual hope in his brother's eyes when it came to being adopted. And watching his little brother speak so excitedly about the couple had nearly torn him apart.

"Virgil, come on buddy, this is going to be really good for you." Martha pleaded as she held onto Virgil's shoulders.

"What about Dee?!" Virgil demanded, "If it's good for me it'll be good for him. I'm not going without Dee!"

Ryan looked to Janus, gesturing for him to do something. Janus refused at first, a stern shake of his head. But a singular, hopeful, pleading, look from Ryan made him give in. With a sigh of his own Janus kneeled down in front of his brother, "They don't want me, Virgil. They just want you."

"Doesn't matter," Virgil proclaimed, "I want you. I want you!"

"Me too," Janus whispered with a sad smile, "But you know what? It's going to be okay. Because you're going to have so much fun and you're going to be so happy and safe. And if they adopt you, then you're going to have two new brothers."

"I don't want two new brothers. I already have a brother. Not a million brothers will ever be good enough."

'Oh god Virgil, please can't you just make this easy for me?' Janus silently begged as he fought back tears, "You'll get your own room, and Ryan was telling me all about the cool toys they got just for you. And Ryan says they have a really pretty house with a really big backyard and they-"

"I don't care," Virgil reiterated, looking to his brother with tear-flooded eyes and sobs large enough to shake his entire body, "I just want you."

Janus smiled weakly, "Hey Virgie, can you do me a favor? Can you take a deep breath for me?" He asked in the softest, most even voice he could muster, "Big breath in, okay? Follow my lead. In" Janus took an exaggerated breath, and let it out a few seconds later with an "And out." His brother repeated the action with shaky breaths.

"Good," Janus said a few deep breaths later, "You lead me now okay? Tell me when to breathe. Ready?"

Virgil nodded, "In," he said, his voice now less shaky and worn. Janus took an almost comedically large deep breath, much larger than the others he'd taken and Virgil giggled at his puffed-up cheeks. When Virgil let him breathe out, Janus was just as dramatic as the breath in, if not more so. Tilting forward, arms wrapping around Virgil as he pulled him down to the ground as he made false complaints about Virgil making him hold it too long and how he had felt like he was going to die, and so on. It all got even more giggles out of the nine-year-old who lightly tried shoving Janus off of him. "Janus! Get off me! You're going to crush me!" Virgil said between laughter.

Janus relented with a smile, pulling his brother back to his feet. His eyes briefly landed on Ryan and Martha who was beginning to look impatient. Janus sighed and looked back to his brother, "Okay Virgil. It's time to go."

Virgil's smile fell like a sack of bricks, "No."

Janus nodded, "It's going to be okay though. Because you're going to be so happy with them."

"No."

"And you're going to be safe, and loved, and they're going to take such good care of you Vee, I promise."

Virgil shook his head, "No."

"And this is going to be such a good thing for you."

"No Jannie, no, please no!" Virgil begged, his fists clinging tightly to Janus's sleaves.

Janus smiled brokenly as he picked up his brother, holding him close as he walked them towards the car. "And I'll visit you, visit you as often as I can and as often as they let me. And you're never going to be alone now Virgie, cause you're going to get a real family."

"No!" Virgil screamed changing his method a bit as he began to hit and kick at his older brother, "I won't go!"

Janus ignored the abuse as Martha opened the back door for him, and Ryan rushed to the other side of the car and into the driver's side.

"I love you so, so much Virgil."

"Janus no!"

"And eventually, when you're all grown up. I'll come and find you, and we can be brothers again." Virgil screamed as Janus leaned down into the back seat, "I love you Virgil, and I'll come to find you, I promise."

Virgil just continued to scream and fight as Janus adjusted his hold, but still didn't quite let go. With tears falling from their eyes at a rapid pace, Janus looked down to his brother "I love you Virgil, okay?"

"Please don't make me go," Virgil begged instead, "Please, I'm sorry if I made you mad, I'll be better. Just-... don't make me go Jan."

Janus's smile cracked, "Oh Virgie," Janus said as he pushed his brother's hair back behind his ears, "I could never be mad at you. You're my baby brother."

"Then don't make me go."

"Don't worry Virgil," Janus said with a cracking smile, "It's all going to be okay, I promise."

And with that, Janus shoved Virgil to the other end of the car. He watched his brother slide across the seats before he jumped out of the way of the door. Martha closed it just before Virgil threw his body against it and began pounding on the windows, a click let them all know Ryan had locked the doors and no matter how much Virgil tried to pry it open it wouldn't, the child safety lock not allowing him to. Virgil's screams and cries were more than audible through the window, and Janus had to hold himself back as the car began to pull away.

He waited and watched until the car turned the corner at the end of the culdesac before finally crumbling onto the ground and dropping to his knees. Martha knelt down with him, attempting to comfort him as Janus sobbed just as hard as his brother had been. Nearly an hour later and Martha had gone inside to fix dinner. But Janus remained outside on the grass for hours, crying until there were no more tears left to cry.

He had just lost his brother.

Word CountL 1298

Sorry it's been a while. I'm in Spain without the S.... I'm also in Spain.

-Kam