A Life Sentence

November 2nd, 2026

November 2nd, 2026

For the second time in less than a year I have had to bury someone I cared about. Kate died yesterday in her sleep peacefully, thankfully. She actually didn't sleep much at the end. We stayed up all hours, just talking. She told me more about herself and and her life during the first days after the collapse and until we found her. I never said a word about myself. I think she was trying to make sure that her memory didn't die with her.

Lucas was actually pretty damn awesome. He brought us food, took care of everything around the house and kept his distance except when Kate asked for him. She really appreciated Lucas and Lucas knew it, even if they didn't always get along.

The dogs somehow knew to be respectful too. The normal rampaging huskies were calm, collected. They offered their love to Kate in only the way a dog could; they piled around her and stayed with her. To be honest I think they were the reason why her last days, her last hours were so peaceful.

If she was in pain she never let on, though I could tell that she was having a hard time breathing. So when she ran out of air and couldn't talk I just picked up the conversation and rambled on like a jabbering monkey about anything I could think of as she laid with her eyes closed. At first I thought it would annoy her, but when I would stop talking she would look at me. I guess she wanted to make sure she wasn't alone. No chance in hell of that.

She asked only one thing of me towards the very end right before she went to sleep for the last time. She asked me to hold her hand. When she asked I almost blurted out how I felt about her then and there, but I managed to keep a lid on it. Maybe that was stupid.

Even after she fell asleep I kept talking. My voice got hoarse and my throat was raw. Lucas knew to bring me water at the right time. This was the last time he saw her. He knelt down and whispered something in her ear. When I asked what he had said he just smiled and said, "Secret." Fair enough.

When she finally drew her last breath I thought I would be ready for it. I had been watching her chest rise and fall with each breath, but for some reason I never thought it would stop. The childlike part of me thought she would just wake up and that would be it.

When the last exhale finally came it felt like some had torn my heart out. I couldn't breathe myself for a moment. My mind raced. For a minute I just kept rambling on like she was alive. I just couldn't process it, I refused to. It felt the same as when Elena died.

When I finally admitted to myself I had to almost force myself to release her hand. It was still warm, it felt alive, even though the grip had loosened. In the end it was Chonk that nudged me in the leg and brought me around. The look on his face is something I will never, ever be able to explain. I don't think I should. It was too special.

I kissed her hand on her ring finger and then stood up. My legs were like jelly. I am not sure if it was from sitting there for so long or because I still wasn't quite ready to leave her side. Finally I was able to force myself to leave her room. I went outside and just started roaming around aimlessly.

Lucas found me and said what he could. He didn't hug me, he isn't a hugger. I am glad he didn't; I probably would have fallen to pieces. I started to do what I always did when something beyond shitty happened, I let logic take over. I started mumbling about digging a grave or some bullshit. Much to my surprise, and truthfully to my relief, Lucas had already taken care of that.

I never wondered what he was doing while I was with Kate, it didn't matter to me. But he was thinking ahead, doing the one thing he knew needed to be done. He dug her grave for me, so I would not be burdened with it. I never told Lucas, but digging Elena's grave still haunted me. Sometimes Lucas can be very perceptive. He took care of it all.

We both laid her into the grave. The dogs served as an honor guard. They all stood perfectly still and quiet. They watched as we carried her out in a litter we had made. I don't know how, but I am positive they knew what was going on. Kate would have been proud of them and I am willing to bet she could not have asked for better friends at her funeral.

Once the goodbyes were said Lucas took the only shovel and all but shoved me away. This was his way of supporting his friend, even if he wouldn't say it.

I sat on the porch until he came back as always Chonk was by my side. When he stepped up on the porch he just looked at me and nodded. Just before he walked into the house he stopped one last time.

"I told her you loved her," Lucas said. "You damn chicken shit." Then he walked inside.

I couldn't help but smile, but to be honest part of me thinks she knew. When I held her hand it wasn't like holding the hand of a friend just for support. I held her hand like I would have held Elena's. Lucas would think I'm crazy for thinking that she could tell the difference, well maybe not. But I was certain she knew. Women are smarter than men.

If she didn't know before she knew at that moment I loved her and was going to be there for her.

And then there were two. The series is almost done. Please stay with it until the end. I appreciate all of the support! Please vote and follow!