Finding me (Howl x Reader)

PART IV THE BEDROOM

I woke up to the to the sound of the rain. It was tapping lightly on the roof and windows. It took me a while to realize what had happened. "I am not dead, after all." I thought as I touched a silky bed sheet. "It's so soft and nice to touch" I muttered. "Maybe I am dead and it's my grave? Or I went to heaven... I hope not hell." I said still trying to regain my full consciousness. I slowly got up on my elbows. The rain stopped completely. I looked around the room. It was a mess. There were plenty of books lying chaotically on the desk, shelves and on the floor. The room had very intimate feel to it. Whatever it was – my grave, heaven or hell I felt safe here.

As I tried to get out of the bed, I found myself wearing a large white cotton shirt with "H.J." embroidered on the left side of the shirt. "Does H stand for heaven?" I thought to myself. "Then what is J for?" I continued contemplating as I took a few steps. Suddenly I heard a loud voice scream. It seemed to be coming from somewhere below me. It said "Howl! She is awake!" the voice sounded alarmed. "Oh, for God's sake I'd rather be dead than this!" I said not knowing what to do. I was evidently at Howl's castle, most probably in his room, considering all the books and a mess. And... I was wearing his shirt! H doesn't stand for Heaven, it stands for Howl, Howl Jenkins! Of course.

I felt as anxiety took over me. Every second seemed to last like ages. I heard steps coming from where the voice had screamed. I saw my clothes carefully folded on a chair. Without any hesitation I took the clothes and ran to the window. As I was opening the window to jump from it, the door to the room opened whereas the window suddenly shut down and made me fall back inside the room. I fell on my back and couldn't get up for a second or two as I was in pain. When I opened my eyes, I saw a tall handsome man standing over me.

"Y/N, dear, are you trying to run away without thanking me for saving your life?" asked Howl as he held out his hand to me. I refused it and I got up on my own.

"How about I saved your life in the first place?" I replied with annoyance.

"And for that I thank you dearly, Y/N" said Howl with what it seemed to be, a sincere gratitude. I shifted uncomfortably.

"Please, for your own good, don't try to escape the castle. You are still too weak. You might hurt yourself even more" he continued.

"So, what happened after I lost my consciousness?" I asked as I tried to cover my body wrapping my arms around it. Howl didn't answer. Instead, he opened a wardrobe, took out a beautiful burgundy dressing gown. He leaned across me and gently put the dressing gown on my shoulders and wrapped me in it. He was close enough for me to feel the heat of his body. I wasn't used to someone taking care of me like that, but especially that someone being Howl.

"I fought Witch of the Waste and managed to escape to safety with you" Howl said. "She put a spell on you, which would have slowly killed you. But I figured out how to save you just in time. You were asleep for two days since then." He continued as if it wasn't a big deal. Perhaps for him it wasn't... just my life. Even though I didn't trust him, my heart seemed to soften a bit towards Howl. He saved me, indeed.

"Thank you" I said quietly. Howl rose his eyebrows and started laughing.

"Whatever you are laughing at?" I snapped with disapproval.

"Oh, forgive me, forgive me my dear Y/N" Howl said, "I didn't expect to hear that from you. You are most welcome." He turned around and walked to the door where he stopped and leaned on it holding his head in his hand. He said "Y/N, I know Madam Suliman wants to see me in the palace or dead. Therefore, I also put a spell on you restricting your magic powers in the castle. You can't use magic in the castle. It is my safety net. After all, I don't know you that well." Howl's face changed from serious to slightly smiling as he said, "but I hope I could get to know you better, if you wouldn't mind."

Once again, I felt uncomfortable with all this attention. I wanted to point out to him that it is absolutely inappropriate, but instead I just said "Then I would like to leave" I took a deep breath and continued "My job here is done, Witch of the Waste didn't get your heart. I can't use magic in the castle, so I have no way of bringing you to the palace and I definitely can't fight you without my powers. I will try to get you next time if that will be required".

"You can try and fight me with your beautiful eyes" he said smiling from ear to ear.

"I would prefer not to" I replied trying not to get red in my face. But it was too late.

We stood there for a minute or so in complete silence while Howl's face slowly became gloomy again.

"Let's have a something to eat first. I will explain when you can leave later" Howl said. "Don't worry, I keep my promises" he finished saying as he came back to me and took my hand. "Let's go" he pulled me behind him, "There is someone I'd like you to meet".