Marvel / cast oneshots

all to much

requested!
autistic reader

a/n
before i start every person with autism is different so this is just from my experiences having autism and a bit of what ive seen in the autistic community :)

y/n pov

i get home from school and check the time 3:47pm, 13 minutes than ill start the stuff i need to do. taking off my shoes by the door i pick them up to carry them back to my room for when i go there. i walk over to the fridge looking around for a snack, not in the mood to try something new i reach and grab a bottle of water. i walk into the main room sitting against the wall on the floor. it was where i always sat but something felt wrong i look up and see the vent i always have closed open. sighing i get up grabbing a broom to close it. having no other interruptions i take a sip of the water. i check the time again 4pm exactly perfect. picking up my school bag and shoes from next to me i head to my room to start homework.

suddenly aware of the fabric touching my skin i take off my shirt and grabbing my favourite hoodie off the floor. i put it on however it feels funny to, i smell it and realise it was freshly washed. i crumple my shoulders up towards my neck tilting my head a bit trying to get rid of the sensation. nope cant do it i take the hoodie off putting it in my bed so that it gets that freshly washed smell off. i like it after a couple days of being washed, so it feels right again. i walk into my wardrobe looking around for my other hoodie. i find it and put it on. okay this feels better. changing into sweatpants i go to sit back at my desk.

crossing my legs up on the seat i put on my noise cancelling headphones playing married life from up on repeat while i get my work done. will i over play this song and get sick of it. yes. am i going to stop. no.

as my left hand fiddles with things on the table or just picks at my fingers i continue to write with my right hand. we were studding the 40's in history something i found interesting. one of my favourite things to do when its raining is listen to steve tell storys about it. not the war as such but the other things in life.

littered around the room were my random hyper fixations that at most lasted a month. i had 3 solved rubix cubes all sitting on my windowsill which i have managed to solve in under a minute for each. all my books sat around the room to, from crime to romance action to mystery. i had some of my drawings blu-tacked above my bed some of the avengers or the compound others of parks or just things i liked. i had a guitar in one corner of my room where i only know a couple songs. some crochet projects sat on my draws, my whole room was really just random.

i fixated on finishing this assignment and before i knew it it was 7pm. i walk out of my room bothered by the bright lights as i always kept my room dark. i walk into the main area again and see steve just walking towards me

"y/n hey i was just about to get you for dinner" he said, well i couldnt hear him from the headphones but i had gotten quite good at lip reading. i didnt want to take them off and be flooded with noise again so i sat at the table silently not talking.

i separated my meal to eat everything equally making sure i eat the best thing last. i looked around to see everyone talking so once again i crossed my legs keeping to myself. until the battery died and i was forced to hear everything.

it all came at once, tonys obnoxious chewing, the sound peoples utensils made on their plates people taking sips off there drink, and the conversations usually i could feed through the conversations and could listen to anyone's but right now its all blended and overwhelming. i slip my headphones off my ears as they hung around my neck as they were now useless i wanted to just finish my food and leave.

nat who i was sat next to turned to me, "you okay hun" she asks noticing me zoning out alot. i nod stopping my leg from boucing

"headphones just died thats all" i smiled masking every urge right now.

"oh okay how was school?" she asked

"busy, loud and annoying" i said. my left hand begun picking at the skin on my thumb so i quickly put my hand under the table. my leg was shaking and i just wanted it all to stop. i could hear the clock ticking. my arms felt weird in my hoodie again. for fucks sake why can't i be normal

nat just hummed in response not noticing my behaviour i was about to aske her if i could leave but she turned to talk to bruce. i turned to wanda pulling at her shirt a bit to get her attention. she looks over at me curious

"can i go" i ask as it all gets to much especially since i was tired from school. she seems to notice my uneasiness and nods smiling. i thank her still not looking in her eyes and walk away

as soon as i was in my room i let it all drop. i plugged my headphones in and started pacing the room making a noise that's kinda like a groan/hum (idk if that made any sense). walking back and forth my hands get twitchy. kinda being like a half fisted jazz hands (again idk it's hard to explain). i continue making the noise as my pacing gets faster. to much it's all to much i look around my room and go it in my cupboard it was small and quiet. silently crying i bang my hands against my head until there was a knock on the door. why can't i be normal.

a/n
i really don't know what this is like it's not like anything ive written before and i feel like these things are quite normal to do idk

if anyone has requests feel free to comment or pm me i have no life :)