To Seek Answers (Mike Schmidt X Reader: Book 2)

Letting You Go

You stood beside Mike, watching the children run around in glee. Mike had barely left your side since you tried to kill yourself a week ago. You'd improved slightly, and despite Mike's hesitance, you'd convinced him that you were ok to go back to work. In reality, you weren't really. But at this point you were desperate to do anything that may help with numbing the pain. And work was just the right thing to keep you busy.

     "Didn't expect to see you back so soon."

     You turned your head slightly to see William approaching. Mike tensed behind you, and you knew he was glaring at your friend. He hadn't quite gotten over all the things he had done.

     "How are you?"

     You could tell William wanted to hug you, but it seemed Mike's warning stare had him slightly nervous.

     You shrugged. You didn't really feel like speaking.

     "Hey, I was wondering. Could you possibly go check on Henry for me?"

     That made you speak. "Why?"

     "Cause he's completely shut himself away. Won't reply to any of messages, and when I go to visit he refuses to let me in and pretends he's not home."

     You tilted your head in confusion. "Isn't Sarah with him?"

     William sighed. "You've been away too long. They're taking a break. Their marriage has really gone downhill since Charlie's death. Sarah's staying with her mum while they think things through."

     You felt your jaw drop. You had no idea. Poor Henry. Hopefully, he and Sarah could sort things out between them. You didn't want to see them part.

     "Yeah, I'll go by and check on him. It'll have to wait till after my shift though."

     William nodded before wishing you well and wandering away.

     You felt a wave of nausea washing over you, and you swayed slightly on your feet. "Are you alright?" Mike queried, concern rising in his voice.

     You nodded your head, staggering slightly. With dread, you realised it was the beginnings of a panic attack. "I just need to go to the bathroom," you mumbled, beginning to stumble away. Mike opened his mouth to say something, before turning away and looking awkwardly at his feet. He didn't want to appear overbearing, but seeing you with that knife was one of the most terrifying things he had ever seen. He didn't want to risk leaving you alone. But he knew he couldn't baby you. That would only make you angry.

     You manoeuvred your way through the restaurant, tripping on your feet and smacking into a table.

     "Oh my!"

     You struggled to breathe, blinking slowly. "Sorry," you muttered. Before noticing in surprise that the occupants of the table you had bumped into were none other than Kylie and Fritz. They were sitting suspiciously close together, but open seeing you the scurried apart.

     "Uh, (Y/n)! I was just taking my break. I'm going right back to work now," Fritz stuttered before his eyes narrowed in confusion. "Are you alright?"

     Kylie reached out a hand to touch your shoulder but you jerked away. Your breathing was becoming more and more erratic. You just needed to get away. You didn't know why it was happening. But you couldn't control it.

     "I-I have to go," you gasped. You pushed yourself from the table and ran to the staff bathroom. You slammed the door behind you and tumbled to the ground.

     Your heart hurt, and you couldn't breathe. You clutched at your chest desperately, trying to find an escape from the torture. You didn't understand why it was happening. You had been able to compose yourself fairly well today. You just didn't understand how things flipped so quickly.