No Questions Asked (A KiriBaku Fic)

Chapter Fourteen: The Wedding Proposal

Things had returned to a relative normal in the days that followed what Bakugou so eloquently referred to as the 'Foliage Fuck-Up'. The pair had fallen back into their easy relationship and comfortable silences, their discussion about Bakugou's NQA outwardly having resolved the awkwardness they'd found themselves in.

However, within both boys, there was a lingering sense of uncertainty; Bakugou regretting not seizing his chance sooner and ripping the bandaid that was his confession off; Kirishima wondering exactly what Bakugou was about to say when Mina and Kaminari interrupted them. Bakugou never brought it up again, and Kirishima didn't force him to.

Neither was sure where their relationship stood, but both of them knew that their feelings for the other extended beyond simple friendship.

Fortunately for them, the universe has a way of disregarding feelings in favor of taking action. It pushes you in the direction you're meant to be in, regardless of internal circumstances.

For Bakugou, Kirishima, and their unwavering romantic tension, this push came in the form of an RSVP screw-up.

"Bakugou! Perfect timing! I need a boyfriend." Kirishima grinned, but his eyes revealed intense nerves.

"A-A boyfriend?" Bakugou felt his heart threaten to burst out of his mouth. What the hell was he talking about?

"Ah, ah, ah." Kirishima put a finger to Bakugou's lips. "No questions asked."

Bakugou swore quietly. "What the hell do you need a boyfriend for?"

Kirishima sat down on his bed, pulling off his bandana and letting his hair fall loose. He gave a rueful chuckle before looking back at Bakugou.

"Remember that cousin I told you about way back? The one with the crazy spice tolerance who got messed up by that Devil-Ramen you ate?"

A spark of recollection flickered vaguely in Bakugou's mind. "Yeah, what about him?"

"Well, he's getting married in a few weeks. I was originally planning on attending alone, but I got a phone call from my aunt, his mom, last night saying how excited she was to meet my hero academy boyfriend."

"But, you're single, aren't you?" Bakugou raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"Extremely." Kirishima confirmed. "But, this particular aunt is extremely nosy and pressuring when it comes to one's romantic life. I forgot that about a year ago I lied and told her that I'd gotten a boyfriend at UA to get her off my back at New Year's, because of that I also forgot to tell her that I'd broken up with my fake boyfriend."

"Kirishima..."

"Not done yet." The redhead grimaced. "And because of all of that, along with the fact that I forgot to send in an official RSVP, she put me down as having a plus-one for everything. So now, not only is my extended family expecting me to have a boyfriend, they've also spent a bunch of additional money to cater to that fake boyfriend."

Bakugou sighed. "Are you stupid or something?"

"Anyway, that brings us to the NQA of the hour: I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend for a weekend." Kirishima could have asked just about anyone to pull off this scheme with him, but in truth, he wanted it to be Bakugou.

"A weekend? I thought this was just going to be some shitty wedding?"

"Yeah, well, the wedding's in Paris. That's part of why I asked you, 'cause I know you speak French really well. We fly out on the 16th, arrive on the 17th, rehearsal dinner and bachelor parties are on the 18th, then the actual wedding is on the 19th. Does that work?"

Bakugou weighed the situation in his head for a moment; on the one hand, Kirishima was inviting him to a romantic weekend where they would have to act like a couple the entire time, but on the other, it was all fake and it might not ever mean anything or turn into anything.

... Allons à Paris.

"Yeah, whatever."

A week passed before Bakugou kicked Kirishima's door in.

"Hey dumbass!"

"Bakugou? What's up?"

"You didn't tell me anything about this fake relationship of ours! How am I supposed to make this believable if I don't have the info?!"

"I didn't really have any info to give you, just that I met you at UA and that we're dating." Kirishima shrugged. "I figured we'd just wing it."

Bakugou rolled his eyes and chucked a binder at Kirishima's head. "I fucking knew you'd say that. This has answers to any question your family could possibly throw at us. Anniversaries, pet names, love languages, all that crap."

Kirishima flipped open the binder and pointed at one of the sections. "You get me red Golden-rayed Lilies on our anniversary? How did you know I like those?"

"This relationship might be fake, but my reputation is not. I'm not going to be burned into your family's memory as some shitty ex of yours. I'm gonna be the fucking number one boyfriend." Bakugou's palms began to spark. "Memorize this shit. Hope you like Armani, bitch."

With that, the blond stomped out of the room, leaving Kirishima to flip through the binder. It was clear that Bakugou had taken his time in making it, evident in the pristine penmanship, attention to detail, and just how accurate all of Kirishima's likes and dislikes were. He wondered absentmindedly if Bakugou had put down his own likes and dislikes with the same accurateness.

First date...

First meeting...

First kiss...

All of their firsts were listed flawlessly under 'F'. (To answer your question, yes, the binder did go from A-Z). Kirishima turned to the first kiss section and read the blurb.

First kiss was initiated by Kirishima. In his room after a rough patrol on his part. It was shit.

Kirishima laughed, this was definitely Bakugou's handiwork. He continued reading.

Follow-up was initiated by Bakugou, this was much better. Butterflies, fireworks, all of it. A number-one first kiss.

"A number one first kiss, huh?" Kirishima murmured to himself, feeling his cheeks going red. "Nah, it's just for the scheme. He probably didn't like it that much."

He continued flipping through the binder, everything he read making him more flustered. Bakugou managed to craft a beautiful relationship from literally nothing; it was accurate, it was romantic, and it was easy to remember because almost none of it was made up.

He was thankful he chose Bakugou for this, because even if nothing came of this weekend, he'd have some wonderful memories and the binder to hold close to him. Perks of having a friend who does everything 110%.

PDA: Minimal, Bakugou doesn't like it and Kirishima prefers words of affirmation. If necessary, Bakugou will tongue Kirishima to keep the ruse intact

Kirishima laughed at that. Yes, this was definitely Bakugou's work.

He fell asleep reading it, mind continually drifting back to the fact that Bakugou said the first 'I Love You'.

He allowed himself to indulge in the fantasy of that being what Bakugou was going to say in the courtyard.

As if, right?