The Time Hopper

All In

A week passed before everyone reached a decision, not a day. They were too distracted, too angry and sad, grieving too much to even properly think about it, much less come to a final decision. I told Alice to come and find me once everyone's minds were made up, and in the meantime to leave me alone. Riley wouldn't have been told that, but he followed it all the same. Didn't come back to my room, was never at the baths or in the dining hall when I was. Sulking with me, maybe. Afraid I'd get too close and pull him back to where he belonged, maybe. 

Or maybe he'd just had enough of me. I mean, that would absolutely be fair enough after everything I had done. Dragged him from his home on some stupid adventure I'd convinced myself was a fairy tale, and then, once he was too far in to get back out, tell him that I didn't want him around anymore. No matter what else I said, no matter what else I did, that would be how it seemed to him and to anyone watching. I couldn't even be sure myself if that was what this was or not.

I spent all the time I could in my room. Not in the bed, or even as the desk, but perched on the windowsill. Sat there, one leg dangling into the room and the other curled up beneath me, I could spend hours staring out over the mountains and valleys that the monastery was perched above. I tried to focus on the view more than my own thoughts, because they were just chasing themselves around in circles. But the view itself made me think as well. There was a strange feeling of remembrance and nostalgia, like when you revisit your favourite restaurant after they've redecorated. Everything is so different, and yet there are still some vague memories. 

I didn't think that those vague memories belonged to. As I looked around, I could see a shadow of this place, laid over the top like tissue paper with a sketch on it. Everything was almost the same, but the peaks of the mountains sat slightly higher up, the valleys were cut in different shapes, and the settlements were so much bigger, so much uglier than they used to be. I wondered who had seen it before. If they had been as miserable as I was now. Probably. There has never been much happiness for the children of the elements. 

I wouldn't stay here much longer, I had already firmly decided that. I would wait to hear what the others had to say, and if they wanted to come with me I would teach them how to pull their powers in and we could be off. Whoever wanted to stay could, with the exception of Riley. I still had to take him home, I just wanted him to understand why before I did. And yet, here I was. Holed up in my room, putting off that conversation for as long as I could. Like a coward. 

In fact, I was so resistant to having to deal with what came next that I ignored Alice when she came to my room and knocked on the door. I knew it was her. I knew it was her before she even reached the door. Her footsteps were always so quick, clipped so precisely against the floor that it left no doubt. Her knock, too, was sharp and quick, no time wasted, no thrills. If you knocked part of a tune into the door, she wouldn't even complete it. Sometimes I wondered if she was a sociopath. 

I had thought that she would assume I was sleeping and come back later, or shout through the door, y'know. Any of the reasonable steps. Which was why I was rather surprised when the late evening twilight suddenly oozed out of the lock, snapping it open and pushing the door wide open. Immediately, I bolted to my feet, letting out a yell of surprise.

"Hey, I could have been changing!" I yelled out in protest as Alice strode into the room, closing the door firmly behind her. She shrugged one shoulder at me.  

"Well, you weren't. Besides, Marie used to bathe us together, it wouldn't be anything I haven't seen before. And I know for a fact that you've been avoiding talking to any of us, so I wasn't going to risk you pretending to be asleep." Alice told me very firmly, with a stern look that told me she wasn't very happy with me. I quieted down my arguments and looked at her, nodding slightly to gesture for her to talk.