weakness | t.k

daddy issues

I woke up and went to the kitchen, not bothering to even look at myself in the mirror.

I walked out of my room to find everyone sitting at the dining table.

The tension in the room was unavoidable.

"Kimiko, you've finally awoken, sit please, dear" my mother said. "We've got an important matter to discuss with both of you" my father added. I looked at Lev who was also seated at the table, he shrugged showing me he was just as confused as I was.

As I walked to sit at the table, I remembered their fight yesterday, anticipating that it had nothing to do with that.

"So, your father and I have been having some complications with, um, our relationship" my mother started "we want the best for the both of you, of course, so we decided that um, excuse me" my mother teared up as she excused herself. "We're separating for your own good, and ours as we can no longer bear each other. Alisa, sadly, had to find out over the phone. We're sorry to break this news so suddenly but it's come to this." My father said before leaving the table.

I turned to Lev with tears forming in my eyes to see him mirroring my emotion.

I swear I've never stood up so fast to hug him.

♫Go ahead and cry, little girl♫

♫Nobody does it like you do♫

♫I know how much it matters to you♫

♫I know that you got daddy issues♫

It broke my heart to see my brother cry, I haven't seen him cry since we were in elementary.

It broke my heart to know my parents couldn't bear each other for just two to three more years.

It broke my heart knowing that there was a possibility that I'd get separated from Lev and that I may have to be with one parent at a time.

Lev and I sobbed as quietly as possible, not wanting to make our parents feel guilty. We sat there together for ages until both of our tears ceased.

I lost all motivation to do anything.

I lost my appetite.

honestly, I lost myself.

(time skip)

After the weekend came Monday, no school. I tried not to allow myself to lose interest in things I loved to do, but some things I couldn't salvage.

I've, somehow, always been big on self-care, so I tried to think of a way to let everything out without becoming a burden. I liked the idea of writing and who knows, maybe one day I'd be a published author.

I grabbed my old laptop and went to the notes application, I began to write. What about? I don't know. I let my fingers do the typing for me.

I was deep in thought trying to figure out what the plot of the story should be, along with the message behind it, when I heard a knock on my bedroom door.

"come in" I said clearing my throat. In walked my mother. "Hey hun, are you doing okay? You haven't left your room since yesterday. Have you eaten? I'm sorry to bombard you with questions after such news, I can't imagine what you're going through right now." she said concerned. "Hi mother, I'm fine thanks for asking. It's nice to know you care enough to ask" I said monotonously. "Alright love, don't hesitate to talk to me about anything from 2x8 to boy problems and depression ok? I'll be in the living room working if you need me" she said relieved. I hummed in response. After she left the room I continued brainstorming.

After coming to a writer's block, I guessed I'd finally have to leave my room to check on Lev, I may be a little younger than, by 2 and 1/2 minutes I'll admit it, him but I've never seen him so broken.

I stepped out of my doorway and made my way to Lev's room. I knocked on the door to have no response, I knocked once more. Still no response. I opened the door to see him laying down with his favorite headphones on hugging a volleyball.

After Lev and I graduated middle school, our parents became more and more distant from us. I was sort of the child who was alone most of the time, other times I'd be with Lev. But Lev was the closest to our parents out of all of us, including Alisa. I know this has to be hurting Lev more than it hurts me.

I walked into his room and motioned to him that I'd be laying down next to him.

I put our favorite childhood movie on and we watched it together.

The movie ended at about 8:00 PM.

I hugged Lev before leaving his room, I walked to my room and showered for so long that the water didn't run hot in the shower anymore.

I laid down on my bed and just stared at the ceiling, wishing I didn't have school tomorrow.

~~

A/N

Idk I can't speak from experience haha my parents were close but not close enough sadly. Um idk what's happening anymore.

for anyone whos going through this just know that I love you :) and hopefully everything will be ok.

guys i need them to separate i'm tired of their bs (4/1/23) this is not an april fools joke :|

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