𝐄𝐋𝐘𝐒𝐈𝐔𝐌 | jay halstead

𝙲𝙷𝙰𝙿𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝚂𝙴𝚅𝙴𝙽

🌹𝓐𝓯𝓽𝓮𝓻𝓶𝓪𝓽𝓱🌹

TW: MENTIONS OF DEATH, MISCARRIAGE⚠️

I faintly heard the beeping machines as I stirred. I became more aware of the tight grip on both my left and right hands and people shuffling in and out.

"She's waking," a voice whispered.

My eyes fluttered open. My body felt so sore and I was having an out-of-body experience.

"Hey," Jay's handsome face came into vision.

"Wh-What?" I stuttered and croaked, "what am I doing here?"

Jay grabbed the glass of water from my bedside and I greedily gulped a few sips of the elixir which soothed my throbbing throat.

"Y/N do you know where you are and what happened?" Connor asked.

"Chicago Med," I nodded, "I was kidnapped, did I sustain serious injuries?"

Connor sighed, "you had a laceration on your head, minor head trauma, bruising to your face and abdomen, three cracked ribs, a broken wrist, excessive internal bleeding and we pulled out three bullets from your body. You are very lucky because you flatlined in the ambulance and we almost lost you on the operating table twice."

I gasped, I should not have been alive but I was extremely grateful considering everything.

"There's more," Will added and both Jay and Connor looked away, "you were about 2 weeks pregnant. Due to the severe bruising and abdominal bleeding, we couldn't save the baby. I'm extremely sorry."

"What?"I asked confused, "that...that can't be true," tears filled my eyes and my voice broke, "I can't be pregnant. I-I am on the pill."

Will looked solemnly, "you were on antibiotics a while back which could have diluted its effect. It happens sometimes."

"N-No, I," I shook my head in denial as tears poured down my cheeks, "oh my God!"

"I'm so sorry Y/N/N," Connor replied as he kissed my cheek.

Jay was looking at me with tears in my eyes, "can I have a minute?"

Everyone nodded and cleared out and Jay and I were alone, "I'm sorry baby. I should have been there to save you. I should have protected you."

"It's not your fault," I squeezed his hand, "you couldn't have known about the kidnapping. I'm the one who's sorry."

"No," Jay shook his head as tears dripped down his cheeks as well, "don't you dare blame yourself."

"How can I not Jay?" I sobbed, "our baby is dead because of me."

"It's not your fault," he restated, "only that sicko's. Don't worry, he's been dealt with."

I nodded to try and stay optimistic about our baby's ephemeral life, "maybe it was just the universe's way of telling us that we're not ready."

"Will said that you didn't sustain any permanent damage," Jay explained, "we can still have kids in the future."

Jay pulled me closer so I was resting my head on his chest and kissed the top of my head. I finally broke down in his arms. The only words I repeated over and over were he killed my baby. I wailed and begged and pleaded for the life of our child. Just like everything in my life, my happiness was evanescent. I gripped his shirt tightly as my waterfall of tears didn't stop until I let out every emotion that I felt in the past 48 hours.