The next face I saw made my whole body freeze in the chair, my eyes fixated. Just at that moment, a new song played on my playlist and the lyrics completely matched the way I was feeling just now.
The first time ever I saw your face
I thought the sun rose in your eyes
And the moon and the stars were the gifts you gave
To the dark and the endless skies.
My eyes were stuck. On her. Her brown hair fell over her face, cupping her focused face perfectly. She was staring down at the paper she was writing on, unaware of the stalker watching her from a close distance. The black sex pistols t-shirt hugged her shoulders and torso. A cardigan pulled it all together, keeping her warm in the autumn colds. My wish for her to look up grew more in seconds. I wanted to see her face, look into her eyes and get closer to her to see the structure of that fragile being.
Before my cover got blown, I quickly pulled myself together and looked down at the notebook. My brain was telling me to get up and go talk to her, meet and befriend her, but I was too scared. That made me give up the idea of talking to her.
She could get uncomfortable, push me away because I disturbed her or yell at me for doing something she doesn't want me to. Scenarios like those kept piling up in my head. I looked up at her again, but her head didn't move. She seemed preoccupied with the words piled up on the paper in front of her that she hadn't noticed somebody looking at her nor did she bother looking up. With her other hand, she kept folding and unfolding the end of the page, as if something was bothering her.
Then I looked back at my notebook to not seem weird to anyone else at the library. Just then I noticed how hot my cheeks are, I instantly covered them with my palms. I bet they're burning red. My heart was speeding a lot. That's what this unknown girl was doing to me.
But I got back to work, thinking I could work properly with such a beautiful girl in front of me driving me crazy in my chair. And I wasn't going to calm down anytime soon. So I just gave up on studying and started browsing the internet for any inspiration for writing. I need to hand in the written story by the end of November, and it was already the 12th of October. That meant I had to get it done. Quickly. I haven't even started the story yet, and I was worried about when I am gonna finish writing and if I'll even finish it. I believed I would be able to do so, and am gonna do anything to make it happen.
A few minutes passed, and the laptop wasn't serving me well so I began looking around the nearest books while taking slow steps. While reading the headings every once in a while a hum would come out of my mouth as a good book I've read or heard of went through my hands. I spent some time like that, and turned around to look around for the girl I saw earlier, but she was nowhere to be found. It made my heart sting slightly as I didn't get the chance to talk to her.
I don't know why I'm like this... It was the first time I ever felt this way and it was strange. My heart is thumping like crazy, all I have on my mind is her hair, my hands in her hair, my fingers twirling her perfectly straight locks, playing with it and just watching her without a word. It would be a scene out of anyone's dream, just with a different person. And it seemed so possible now, but there was a large brick wall between us, high enough to climb over, but I didn't know what was on the other side, and it scared me.
I returned to my things and sat down, carrying a romance book about two people who loved each other endlessly but couldn't be together. I hoped it would keep my mind busy for some time before I would go home to get ready for work and exercise for a bit.
I read and read, for around half an hour but I kept seeing her in the female character, myself in the male. But it wasn't possible, and I knew that but it wasn't that easy. As the clock in the room struck 4:30, I stood up and packed my things back into my backpack, slid my jacket back on and grabbed the rest of the things. Upon returning the romance book, I walked outside. It had gotten pretty cold, and the rain was pouring. I pulled my jacket hood on and started running down the street to my apartment.
It took a while, but I arrived safely, and I wasn't that wet, so it was okay. The warmth of the apartment hugged my cold body and heated me. After changing, I worked out for some time, then showered and started getting ready for work. It was 6 pm so I grabbed something to eat quickly. That "something" happened to be a ham and cheese sandwich I made last night before bed. As I ate it, I cleaned up around the apartment, turned the washing machine on and cleaned the kitchen counter along with the dishes. All the work was done by 6:30 and I left to go to the bar I worked at since I moved here. The owner was Arthur's uncle who was nice enough to offer the inexperienced me a job there.
But it was much more than that. I had control over the orders, when each one was going out to the tables, everyone who sat at the bar had to be controlled, especially when they were drunk. It was a fun job, it got tiring but I enjoyed it and did it with confidence and happiness. I worked at as a bartender, served drinks and refilled all the fridges and cabinets. I also wrote down things we needed to order. Sometimes I would watch my colleagues work and advise them on how to work, but I didn't push or force them. My work for the day was over and I left the bar after 10:15 pm. I usually stayed until 11 pm but today there wasn't much to help the others with, so I went home. Arthur has been calling me the whole evening, praying for me to go outside. We went out rarely because it always ended with someone crashing a car. Luckily, it never ended without anyone getting hurt, but I still remember every single one of the times. I was usually the one that saved everyone's lives.
As I arrived home, I took a quick shower and made dinner - some bolognese pasta. It seemed like the easiest thing to make. I froze some for tomorrow and ate at my table while going over the notes I wrote at the library. Soon, I started zoning out and my mind shifted to her. To her hair and the scene played over and over, but she didn't look up at me. In real life or the scene. And it saddened me completely. I couldn't imagine what she looked like. She was probably the same as me - a creative person in the heart, but a logical one in the brain. And that made my heart thump even faster, thoughts and scenes of us together rushing through my mind, thinking of the things we would do together.
Summer dates where we drove into the hill, parked the car, wandered around the forest for a while, had a dip in the lake and dried off in the sun, then went home and ate homemade food. Without any worries, obligations or any bad things. That might be what I need to pull myself out of my routine - a partner. With a long sigh, I returned from my imagination to reality and looked around the apartment.
I forced myself up from the chair to wash the dishes, finish cleaning the dining table and go to bed. I grabbed my laptop from the backpack on the way and laid down. After the system loaded, I played some series I recently found. The title is "All of us are dead". It's a Korean zombie drama revolving around a group of high school students who are trying to escape a school full of zombies. After watching an episode, I started getting tired, so I put the laptop away and curled up in bed. I couldn't help nuzzling my face into my pillow and my brain was soon tightly asleep under the white sheets. My loose body was tossing itself around the bed throughout the night, pushing the sheets off, then hugging them.
YOU ARE READING
One Way Ticket | a love story
No FicciónThe boy who's always had his nose in the book, from science to fantasy. Frequent visits to the British library occured once he started working on a new story to publish in the school newspapers and later turn into a book. He was seeking inspiration...
