Lights, Camera, Action!

Chapter 33: Guilt and Grief

"Honey... You've got a little something on you." Branch sighed eventually, gesturing to her entire body. It was an understatement, lame and proof of what a bad friend he was. Honey was going through trauma and grief at a much delayed reaction and all he could do was make jokes. He was nothing if not useless and pathetic.

Yet it was difficult for him as well. Storm had been his best friend since birth practically and had always looked out for him. When he died, a darkness clouded Branch's world view. He started to lose the joy and hope in people Storm had always told him to have. Still, unlike Honey, Branch sought out help. He came to terms with Storm's death and put the grief behind him. He had started to see the brightness and goodness in people again, thinking on his long gone friend with a smile and fond memories. Branch had promised Storm he would keep Honey safe though. While he stopped her from joining him, it wasn't as if he'd stopped Honey going to work as Beauty's assassin apprentice. It wasn't as if he stopped her when she started dating Shadow by poisoning him. Wasn't as if he intervened when she... When she really needed a friend. Branch had long since failed at keeping his promise. If he had, her grief maybe wouldn't have gotten this terrible.

What Honey was feeling had long since stopped being an intense emotion. It stopped being denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. It stopped being healthy. Grief can feel like a crushing, non-stop tsunami of emotions and it can also feel like a long rollercoaster of iOS and downs. That's normal grief. Good grief, even. It means you are interacting with that potentially traumatic event in your life. Honey had stopped interacting with that day. Stopped thinking about what she'd done or hadn't done. Stopped thinking about Storm as a person and who he was. To her, Storm was now this person who was her happily ever after and was unjustly taken from her too soon. It was a sickness, the grief Honey had. She needed to get help, fast.

She laughed as she twirled, blood flying in all directions. It splattered on her clothes, the ground, trees and mere millimetres from him. Branch was certain he would lose his lunch if any of her blood, or God forbid someone else's blood, got on him. "Branch sweetheart, you're going to have to be more specific." Honey fell backwards as if to land in the ground. The ground covered in blood. No, Branch drew the line at that level of madness so stepped out to pull her upright. She pouted as he did so. "Party pooper." Honey huffed before flouncing away.

Branch released a breath he hadn't realised he'd been holding. His hands shook where Honey's fingers had once been and he begged himself to calm down. He couldn't remember the last time she'd used that phrase, if ever. Honey in her regular mind would consider it immature and childish. But she was not in her regular mind. She was in the mind of a grieving child. Not even a tween or teenager. A literal child who wasn't even into double digits yet. That was his best friend's, the assassin's, mental state. "I need help." Branch realised. He couldn't help Honey on his own, he needed more people who were more experienced in either Honey or trauma. An older adult who had gone through stuff and recovered or gone through a lot of training and education to be paid to make people feel better. Branch ticked absolutely no box on that list.

Still, he couldn't leave Honey alone. If he did, there may not be a Honey to come back to... It was a horrible and morbid thought but one he'd had to take into consideration within the last decade as he sat on the sidelines abs watched as his best friend rapidly deteriorated. It wasn't as if this was a slow thing that crept up on him. Branch had seen in recent years how quickly Honey had fallen and had done nothing to catch her. Now, he feared she was beyond being caught.

Branch did still have his watch though so it wasn't like the pair were totally cut off. Looking around, he spotted Honey sitting on a log, still a bloody mess. You could definitely identify her. He came and sat beside her. He would need help on getting her back but that didn't mean he couldn't try and tug. "Storm's death wasn't your fault, Honey. He got very sick, very quickly. It's a cruel miracle you created the antidote with him still alive. He shouldn't have made it as long as he did." He took her hands in his, holding her tightly and ignoring the blood. "Look at me." Branch told her gently and smiled when she complied. "I want you to repeat this after me:

"I, Honey Forest,"

"I, Honey Forest,"

"Am not responsible or to blame."

"Am not responsible... Or to blame..."

"For the death of Storm Grave."

Silence.

"For the death of-"

"I HEARD YOU THE FIRST TIME!" Honey sprang up from her seat, eyes watery and blazing. She had pulled away and was freefalling now. "I heard you. I always hear you. I can't believe you. I don't believe you. HE DIED IN MY ARMS, BRANCH! THE ANTIDOTE WAS MERE INCHES AWAY! I HESITATED AND HE DIED! I FOLLOWED HIS RESPECT AND WISHES AND HE DIED! I LET MYSELF CARE AND HE DIED! I'M AN ASSASSIN! I CONTROL WHO LIVES OR DIES!" She collapsed into a sobbing, bleeding heap on the floor. "I let him die..." Honey curled herself up into a ball and buried her head in her lap. That probably wasn't a good idea as she was still bleeding immensely but Branch was stunned into silence.

It wasn't as if her shouts were news to him, Branch had heard them many times over the years. The many depressing and harmful reasons why Honey Forest is responsible for the death of Storm Grave. Not that he believed any of them. Storm had been given an opportunity to live but remain in poverty. He chose to be free of such chaos. Knowing full well it would be difficult, he asked Branch to stall Honey so he could die in peace. 'Just one more thing I failed you at.' He thought to the heavens as Honey violently cried on the ground. "Honey... You need to... No, I can't say that. I know that whatever you feel, you've been feeling for a long time. What I can sat though, is that you need help. Big time. Help that myself and Athena can't provide. We may have known Storm but that probably only makes it worse. I'm going to call your Mum and then-"

"NO! I DON'T WANT HER! I DON'T WANT BEAUTY! I DON'T WANT ATHENA, I DON'T WANT YOU!" Honey got to her feet, bloody palms clenched, teeth bared and tears creating a waterfall down her cheeks. "JUST LEAVE ME ALONE! LET ME DIE! JUST LIKE I DID FOR HIM!" Branch was up on his feet and immediately behind her. Grabbing her hands, he pulled them behind her back and held them tightly. She screamed and fought against him, kicking his feet and throwing her body against his. His gloves became stained with the deepest colour of red he'd ever seen. "LET ME GO!" Honey screamed before pitching her body forward and tossing Branch over her body, headbutting him as she came back up. Her head hurt a little but it meant nothing, she was deceptively strong.

Branch lay dazed and nauseous on the ground. The light shone too harshly in his eyes and the birds chirped too loudly. Everything ached. "Honey..." He mumbled weakly, losing consciousness fast.

The grieving and deadly assassin knelt over her friend, blood dripping from her onto him. "Sorry Branch, it's nothing personal." She rubbed his temple softly yet with some pressure so he fell asleep quicker. "Now, if you excuse me, I'll get someone to make sure you'll okay but I have more pressing matters to attend to. More specifically, I accidentally left some people out of..." Her words were drowned away in a haze of comforting darkness as black spots danced in his vision and Branch could feel himself slipping between awake and asleep.

Whatever she was saying though, it would never be good for anyone involved.

I hope you enjoyed this chapter, again quite intense. I thought the last couple of paragraphs were interesting as well as the repeating words bit. I'll probably update again tomorrow. Adiós.