All of me (Part of Me Book 2)

Chapter 13

Henson's POV

I woke up feeling fine because even though she told me that she is Kier's, it still gave me hope that she loves me. Until Xynne came through the door and hugged me while looking so sorry. She murmured my name while crying and that's my cue to prepare my heart for the big explosion.

"She wants me to tell you that no matter how true your love is, she still needs to do something that won't burden the loaded mistakes that love brought. I'm sorry, Hens. I am not sure if her decision is right but I can't say that it is wrong." Xynne said and her hug tightened. It seems like she knows that I'm going to lose all my strength, and she's right. I am.

Why is this happening? I waited for 7 years. 7-damn years just to make a move and make her mine. At langyang 'yan. Maghintay?

"Langya! Dapat umpisa palang sinundan ko na siya diba? Dapat noon palang gumalaw na ko gaya nang ginawa ni Kier. Pero hayop, naghintay ako. Naghintay ako sa taong wala namang sinabing babalik sakin." I laughed bitterly. "Sakin? Naging saakin nga ba?" I laughed again and cried on Xynne's shoulders.

Dahil sa ginagawa mo Riri, I'm doubting you and your love. You're so right for me but you're never real.

"Hens, she loves you. I know that and I know that you feel it-"

"No, I don't. She wouldn't hurt me if she loves me. She wouldn't even try." I interrupted and hugged her back. Her hand is patting my back, trying to calm me down but it made me cry more. Ibig sabihin nito, totoo to. I am losing Riri. No, I already lost her.

"Sometimes you need to hurt the one you love to make things right. Hindi sa lahat nang pagkakataon 'yung mahal mo 'yung pipiliin mo." She explained.

"That's absurd, Xynne. Tanga lang ang gumagawa niyan." Why hurt someone you love? Why hurt yourself and lose love? Katangahan 'yun. Kung totoo 'yung pagmamahal mo ipaglalaban mo. Hindi ganito. Iniiwan at sinasaktan mo.

"You're wrong. Tell me, Hens. Tanga ba ang pagpili nang dapat at tama? Tanga ba sila para piliin 'yung isang bagay na kahit papaano e makakabawas sa mali na nagawa nila? Hindi, Hens. That's not stupidity, that's bravery. They're brave enough to put their heart on the knife to make things right. Hens, sometimes happiness is not found in love but in the satisfaction of letting someone go for the right things. Yung satisfaction na alam mo sarili mong ginawa mo yung tama to keep the people that shouldn't be hurt- free from pain. And on her situation, those people are Kier and Star-her family. The family that she created on her own. Let's not take them away from her and vice versa. And think of it, what if pinili ka niya? Yes, magiging masaya kayo e paano naman si Kier na simula palang pinaglaban na siya? Si Star na masyado pang bata para paliwanagan nang kaguluhan nang buhay at pagmamahal? And in time kapag lumaki na siya dun niya marerealize that she's in a broken family. Oo siguro nga mabibigay mo yung apelyido mo sakaniya at pagmamahal as a father pero that doesn't change the fact na si Kier talaga ang ama niya. In time she'll find her father's comfort that only Kier can give. And lastly, si Xyril. Masisiguro mo bang mapupunan mo lahat nang mawawala sakaniya kapag pinili ka niya?"

The last line is a bomb. But still, bakit hindi ko magawang itatak sa puso at isip ko lahat nang sinabi niya. She's making a damn point but I can't grasp any of it.

I just found myself hugging her tighter to keep myself from crying harder than I already am doing.

"It was so unfair, Xynne. Bakit ako nagawa kong maghintay tapos siya hindi? Bakit niya kasi inentertain si Kier? Kung mahal niya talaga ako hindi niya gagawin 'yun. Edi sana walang Star na naiipit, edi sana-"

I wasn't able to finish my outburst when she pushed me and slapped me so damn hard.

"Langyang kabitteran 'yan, Hens! Seriously?!" She yelled at me and I just can't look at her kasi ako mismo nagulat sa sinabi ko and I am so ashamed of it, pero bakit ganun, I wanted to defend myself and part of me wants to yell at her too and say that I am right.