WARNING: This chapter contains SUICIDE ATTEMPT scene. If this might trigger you, you can freely skip this part. Thank you.
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CORVUS
I don't know how much time I actually spent lying here in this hospital. The moment I opened my eyes, the first thing that I heard is my Mom's loud cries.
"Oh my God! Praise God!" sigaw pa nito, ngunit hindi ko pa sila gaanong maaninag dahil sa panlalabo ng aking mga mata.
"My son..." my Mom whispered and I felt her hugged my body.
"Call the doctor now, Calvis!" sigaw ni Mommy.
"M-Mommy..." mahinang saad ko.
"Anak, don't push yourself okay? The doctor will arrive at any moment now. I love you, son. Thank you for waking up." sabi nito sa akin at ngumiti bago ako dinampian ng halik sa aking noo. Kaagad ko siyang sinunod. I don't know why I feel so bad, I am mad at everything except to my Mom. Nawalan ako ng malay na hindi nakikita ang Tatay ko ngunit pati ba naman sa pag-gising ko ay wala rin siya?
"Doc, my son just waked up." I heard my Mom said.
"That's a good news Mrs. Alvarado. We've been waiting for his consciousness to go back for a year already." saad ng Doktor. I was surprised, I was asleep for a year? Doon ko napagtanto na kung kaya't hindi ako gaanong makagalaw ngayon ay dahil isang taon din ako nakaratay rito sa ospital.
"Anak, you were in a coma for a year and almost 4 months after what happened. Thank you for coming back to us." sabi sa akin ni Mommy marahil nakita niya na ako ay nagtataka sa mga sinabi ng doktor.
"W-Water..." mahinang usal ko, kaagad naman nila akong pinagbigyan. Hindi ako makapagsalita kaagad dahil sa panunuyo ng aking bibig.
"Anak, what are you feeling?" tanong sa akin ni Mommy. I stared at her, I don't know why I suddenly can't speak. I can't open my mouth to say anything, why...
"Doc, why is my son can't speak?" tanong ni Mommy nang makita niyang nahihirapan na ako magsalita.
"Can you leave us for a while Mrs. Alvarado? We will just check him." sabi ng doktor. Sumunod naman kaagad sa kanila si Mommy at Calvis.
Ilang minuto ako ineksamina ng doctor at may iilang aparato silang ginamit. I felt like I am crying, I can't speak. I can't have my peace, sa tuwing titingin ako sa paligid para akong binabangungot, para akong patuloy na pinaparusahan ng mundo.
"Corvus, calm down." saad nito ngunit hindi ko alam bakit hindi ko magawang sumunod sa kaniya. Patuloy lang ako sa pag-iyak at pagsiksik sa isang gilid ng kama. Natatakot ako, hindi ko alam kung bakit inabot ako sa ganitong sitwasyon.
"Doc, what's happening to my son?" tanong ni Mommy at naluluhang pinapakalma ako, ngunit sa sobrang pangangamba kong madamay siya ay tinulak ko siya papalayo.
"D-Doon ka! B-Babarilin ka nila!" sigaw ko at napakagat sa aking daliri. Nang magdugo iyon ay marahas iyong tinanggal ni Mommy mula sa aking bibig.
"Anak, don't hurt yourself!" sabi nito ngunit para akong walang marinig.
"No! Don't touch me! Don't k-kill me p-please..." usal ko, sobrang natatakot ako sa paligid, I started to cover my head using my arms, I want to hide my eyes, I don't want to see them, the cruel world.
"Anak, this is Mommy. Look at Mommy, p-please." umiling-iling ako, I don't want to let my Mom suffer too. No, I don't want that.
"L-Leave me a-alone!" sigaw ko sa kanilang lahat. Don't look at me, don't pity me.
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