Magnolia Blooms

4. Tear In My Heart

Josh got home just as Debby was putting the pasta in the water and the meatballs in the simmering sauce.

"Hello my favourite girls!" He said as he came into the house. "How was your day?"

Maggie jumped up and ran to her Papa.

"We went to McDonald's and I played in the play-place with Rosie. And we went shopping and I got new shoes because my foots are too big for my other shoes. And Mama says I'm getting too tall and got me new pants and shirts, too. And I had chicken nuggets and I had honey. And a apple juice. And Mama let me have ice cream!"

"Wow! Sounds like you had a busy day!" Josh said, picking his little girl up.

"And then Mama and I made meat bulbs and a secret for dessert!"

"Ooh!" Josh said, carrying Maggie into the kitchen and saying hello to his wife. "I love surprises for dessert."

"Hey, Bug?" Josh asked. "Can you help me set the table?"

"Okay, Papa!" Maggie agreed. Josh took out forks and plates and napkins. Maggie put the forks and napkins out while Josh put out the plates.

While Debby was dealing with the pasta, Josh started cutting up lettuce and cucumbers and carrots for a salad while getting Maggie to wash the cherry tomatoes.

Since coming to live with Josh, he and Debby had introduced Maggie to a wide variety of foods. During the summer when they were on tour, Josh and Debby made sure Maggie got a variety as well, even if it meant Debby and Maggie went somewhere in town for lunch because the venue offered fried foods only.

Josh and Debby weren't pushing Maggie to eat only healthy foods; kids need things like McDonald's or hot dogs. But with Maggie, her early years hadn't offered her a lot of options. She'd never had a carrot or cucumber before living with Josh. So he and Debby made sure to introduce all sorts of different and healthy options. Maggie was becoming a good eater with a wide variety of likes. She knew the rule. Three bites at least before she could say if she liked it or not. Usually she liked what she was eating. Sometimes one bite was enough for her to know she absolutely hated a food. Eggplant and liver had been the first one bite only foods. Josh and Debby didn't want Maggie to have an unhealthy relationship with food, so if one bite was enough for her to absolutely hate a food, they'd try to coax a second, but if Maggie was adamant, that meant she really really didn't like it, and they left it.

The list of dislikes was much smaller than likes. Maggie loved most vegetables and fruits, most meats, potatoes, pasta, milk, cheese, yogourt, and a whole host of healthy foods. She ate well and knew she had to have something healthy for every unhealthy food she wanted. So a cookie might mean yogourt or carrots and hummus or dip before a cookie. Sometimes she forgot all about the cookie.  Sometimes, she didn't. But Maggie was finally at a healthy weight for a seven year old. She had dimples in her cheeks when she smiled now.

Sometimes it was hard to differentiate her from any other seven year old. Often the abuse and neglect of her early formative years were obvious. She spoke more like a four or five year old, but considering just two years ago she couldn't say a single word, it was pretty remarkable.

She had a hard time with writing and reading and Josh and Debby spent a lot of time working with her on her reading and writing. They also had a tutor coming once a week to work with Maggie.

Cutlery was still a work in progress and she worked really hard at using it. There was definite improvement, and Josh was certain she'd be eating just fine when she was old enough for it to matter.

And she was still not toilet trained at night. But Jenna and even the pediatrician said it wasn't abnormal. Maggie wore diapers at night but during the day was completely and fully toilet trained.

Their biggest concern, honestly, were the nightmares. They were nightly now. It broke Josh's heart for his little girl that she'd wake up so terrified, screaming so, so loud. It could take her some time to settle down. Other times, she fell right back to sleep once Josh, Debby or Jim slept with her or they brought her to their bed.

That night, though, Josh looked at his daughter twirling spaghetti around her fork, with tomato sauce all over her face, and smiled. Regardless of the challenges she faced, Maggie was healthy, happy, and growing. He'd saved her life. They had saved her.

Once dinner was done and Maggie was bathed and in bed (no doubt to wake up screaming in just a few hours), Debby looked at Josh pointedly.

"What?" Josh asked.

"We need to talk about Maggie," she said.

"What about her? She's okay, isn't she?"

"She's healthy. She's happy. During the day, anyway. Yes, generally, she's fine. But today on the way home, in the car, she asked me where the scary room is."

"What's the scary room?" Josh asked.

"I don't know. But she said it's 'where the monsters live'," Debby said.

Josh frowned at Debby.

"Monsters?"

Debby nodded.

"I asked her about the monsters. She says they have faces that look like they melted and hundreds of spiky teeth with something dripping off them. She says maybe poison. And they say horrible things but she claims not to remember them."

"The nightmares?" Josh asked.

Debby nodded again.

"I think so. I called the doctor's office to talk to him about it. Maybe Maggie needs a therapist?"

"Maybe. Wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. We have absolutely no idea what her birth parents were like. Except that they dumped her in a lane way in a fucking trash bag. This tiny little thing who couldn't even walk or talk. I'm still sometimes haunted by those eyes staring back at me when I opened that bag."

Josh shook his head remembering the night he'd found Maggie and the days after when he took her in.

"You were in the right place at the right time," Debby said, snuggling up to her husband. "And I love that kid as if I'd given birth to her myself. She's our kid, no matter what. But these nightmares. I don't care about the lost sleep. But Maggie needs good sleep."

Josh nodded and put his arm around his wife. But he'd left the room. He was back on Magnolia Street, behind the Nationwide Arena, moving a bag of garbage someone had literally tossed out a moving car. He was remembering the whimper he heard and thought was a puppy, and his shock, anger and horror at the small child inside the plastic bag.

His trip down memory lane was interrupted by a piercing scream from upstairs. Maggie.

The two adults jumped up and ran to their daughter.