Call me : Darkness

She will always hate me

"Moi soverennyi?" A small voice spoke from outside the Darkling's door. He tipped his head to the left, dark eyes trailing the door as if burning holes through it for the person to enter. He looked back down at Alina's face peacefully resting over the pristine sheets.
He gave a soft hum of acknowledgement and the door creaked open, Ivan's face peeking in. He didn't start speaking right away, but eyed the general and Alina with uneasiness.
"Well?" The darkling raised a single brow, as if urging him to say his piece and go back to the infirmary to tend to the crew.

Alina's little show had caused more than enough damage for a whole century. Most of the crew were either burnt to toast, or were decorated with filthy blisters. Even the Darkling's face wore a line of blisters, dancing from his left brow, across his lips.
No one commented on it though.
He was sure Alina would, once she woke up.
It suits you, filthy as you are. Her voice echoed in his head, reminiscing the moments where once Alina would have said so without mirth. Probably with a playful jab to his elbow, just....being Alina and not this girl who was struggling with about the health of her daughter.

"There's er..." Ivan hesitated, fumbling for words. Most of them were at the tip of his tongue, just working there way out in a way the general wouldn't find him crazy. Darkling frowned again, pressing his lips into a thin line and silently beckoning the heartrender to just get off with it.
Ivan composed himself once more, opening his mouth, then cringing lightly and words finally flew out, "I think you should come to the infirmary....moi soverennyi." He hastily added.

The Darkling sighed. He wasn't typically in the mood to scowl at Ivan's indignity, or care enough to press another soft kiss to Alina's knuckle. He simply stood up and swept across the hall, closing the gap between him and the door. Ivan meekly stalked out, expecting the general to follow, he did.
They were halfway to the infirmary when Darkling broke the silence which seemed to stretch on forever, "What exactly is the problem, Ivan?" He growled, already tired of walking.

He had used intense amount of his shadows to cool down Alina after her whole light show. A bit of merzost wouldn't hurt after all, but he was pretty content that whatever Alina did, merzost was already involved in it.

That doesn't entirely mean that he wasn't tired.
If this was another nimble complain about a crew member dying of the burns, then Saints help Ivan.

"It's about...erm....Aurora," He spoke in Darkling subconsciously started pacing. He didn't want to know why Ivan had not told him about her right away. The possibilities only made his heart stutter unevenly and made him pace faster.

Aurora's lifeless form on the infirmary bed, her skin finally cooling down only to grow limb and lifeless, like a block of ice. The jittery eyes which had once followed him across tents and grazed his shadows tenderly - closed. The smile which once etched upon her delightful face, crumbled.

Aleksander couldn't bear the thought - but that was the whole point wasn't it? Aleksander couldn't bear such thought, hence Aleksander had to die. The darkling, however, could and will bear such thought. Even if he has to burn away half the ship in his rage and scuff out half of his hair in guilt.

He could take it.

He stopped only a moment before a small bucket of water, a servant nearby scraping the floor off dust and filth. The bucket was half filled, water distilled, if only lightly murky. He could see his reflection in the water, and although the water was as unclean as ever, he saw his image, prime and perfect. Saw himself for who he truly was.

Because now there would be no useless child - consciously or subconsciously - running around him, pointing at maps and tracing their finger along the curvy lined of landscapes. There would be no impish smiles, no retracting embraces, no curious eyes. There would just be blessed silence, a silence which was once treasured, owned by him, but now nothing more than a curse.