𝙊𝙪𝙧 𝙨𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙚𝙧 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪

𝘾𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙩𝙬𝙤

"𝙜𝙤𝙣𝙚"

The funeral. That day was here and I didn't know how to respond. The week before her funeral mom was leaving us here so she could manage all the arrangements and mostly to comfort the boys. We would be driving up there the day of the funeral.

We got there and mom was trying to stay strong so she tried to talk about different things like how belly's dress was wrinkly. Then gave up and told us to go find the boys and I found jeremiah and hugged him and he tried to kiss me but I backed away and kept my head in his

"Jeremiah we shouldn't do this infront of everyone." I say, I didn't think it was the time and I felt like jeremiah just thought of me as a distraction sometimes but I would be that for him if he needed it.

"I don't care may, I love you and you make me happy and I really need to be happy right now may." He looked at me serious and pulled my waist closer to him and kissed me, and as soon as people were whisper I pulled away.

"I think I'm gonna go find conrad." I say walking away going to give conrad my condolences but jeremiah grabs my waist.

"Wait can you just kiss me a little more, I don't want to share you with Conrad today." Jeremiah says as he kisses me more but I stop him.

"Jere, that's not fair he's having a hard time too." I say not wanting to be harsh with him today.

"Then let me be unfair, he can't take you too, everyone is checking in on conrad making sure he's ok but what about me, don't let him take you away from me too. Just a few more minutes and I'll come with you to see him please." Jeremiah says and I just nod and pull him where no one can see us and we just kiss.

By the time we get done the ceremony is about to start and me and Jeremiah sit down next to conrad and the service was long and the preacher said nice things about Susannah but I know he didn't know her. After I find conrad and talk to him for a bit.

"Hey Connie." He sorta smiles and just waves but bring him in hug and tell him in sorry.

"It's okay. I'm just glad you took care of jeremiah when I couldn't and I'm glad it wasn't anyone else, I'm glad it was you may." He says genuinely and walks away and we watch Susannah being lowered to the ground.

The first people to lower flowers on her casket was jere and conrad. Then everyone else just add their flowers in. When it was over jeremiah just comes over and hugs me digging his head in my neck crying, when we get to his house, me, belly and jere stay in his room.

"Are you guys hungry." Jeremiah ask and I shrug.

"Are you?"belly asked, I knew she was hungry she just didn't want to say she was.

"The food is downstairs." He says as if saying he didn't want to go downstairs. I don't say anything, I just get up and go to the door until he grabs me and tells me to stay.

"No. It's okay I can go get it."belly says truthfully. She walks out and I sit down across from jeremiah.

"Why are you sitting across from me." He asked like he was hurt.

"Because if I do you'd try to kiss me and i don't think when I'm around you jere." I say truthfully hoping it doesn't hurt his feelings but he grabs my wrist and pulls me into his lap.

"Good I don't ever want you to think when your around me." He says and starts to kiss me then kiss my neck and he starts to lay down and I'm on top of him kissing him but I stop us and get off of him.

"Why'd you stop." Jeremiah asked confused and slightly hurt.

"This is what I'm talking about jere, I don't want to be just some type of distraction, I want you to tell me how I can help you stop hurting again jere." I say as the words just poured out of me.