The goddess of life (Technoblade x reader)

Chapter 13

Techno pulls away from the hug and stares at the man. "Phil- oh my god it's really you!" He exclaimed.

I stood there a bit awkward but I didn't say anything because I didn't want to interrupt their little family reunion. It was sweet seeing Techno this excited over seeing this man. I don't think I've ever seen him this happy before actually.

I see the bags of groceries Techno had placed down before engulfing Phil in a hug. I mean I might as well go put them away. As I grab the bags Techno places his hand in front of mine. "You don't have to grab those, you know?" He says. "Oh it's no big deal. It'll let you spend more time with your father anyways" i respond to him showing him a small smile.

I placed the last food item in the fridge and go back to the living room where I find Techno and Phil chatting and laughing. "Wait. How long are you planning on staying here?" Techno asks the winged man. "Uh- well to be honest I'm not quite sure. Probably a couple days?" He says as more of a question than an answer. "In that case you can stay in the spare house." 

To be honest I zoned out so many times while listening to their conversation. I was listening to my family in my head- well it's not really my family is it? They have the same voice and mostly the same personality. But I don't know... they are just different. I guess they're just voices now. The voices are as annoying as they were earlier today but they were still rambling about how Techno doesn't truly care about me and how I should kill him and blah blah blah...

Techno and Phil eventually left I'm not exactly sure why but I can only assume it was to go show Phil the spare house. I made my way over to Steve, techno's pet polar bear. I place my hand on his head and start rubbing him. "Hey Steve, how are you doin' bud?" I say out loud hoping only Steve can hear me. Of course I didn't get an answer because he is a fucking polar bear. Once I remove my hand from Steve's head he immediately starts whining. "Oh- haha" I say a but taken aback my the bears whines. I continue scratching his head when I feel a sudden sleepiness hit me. I placed my head on Steve's thick fur and shut my eyes.

I didn't end up falling asleep but at least I could take a moment to think about everything. It feels like my whole life is changing, I mean it kind of is. First, I almost killed my (now ex) boyfriend. THEN, I moved into a house with the person everyone told me was the enemy. I almost got kidnapped by some Nether guards. And worst of all my family's voices are back... I don't want to think about that right now. It's too sad to think about.

Technoblade. He is well interesting. He makes me feel safe which I am not used to. I'm not sure how I feel about him. I think I can't trust him. Right? Even if I can trust him I don't think I will ever fully trust anyone. Either way, he is very nice, to me anyways. It's definitely not what I expected considering all the things Quackity told me about him. Why did I ever believe Quackity? I knew he was a douche bag yet I didn't care. He made me feel like I couldn't leave him. Like I was trapped. But it's different now. I'm happy with Technoblade, HE makes me happy. Do I like him? No! Right? I don't know what to think anymore. Techno makes me feel a type of way I've never ever felt before. I feel like I can finally be free and be myself when im with him.

I love everything about him. The way his hands are so tuff but so delicate in mine. The way he is so cold yet so soft with the ones he cares about. I love how his tusks poke out of his mouth when he smiles or laughs. But I don't like like him. I don't think so? Does he like me like that?

Aria: He could never like you!
Arthur: Yeah! You're ugly and insignificant!
Louis: he could NEVER love someone like YOU!

'THATS NOT TRUE!' I scream in my head. It can't be! Is it?

Arthur: why would we lie, dear?
Louis: of course it's true!

I feel a tear slip from my eye. I let it fall not caring if anyone sees. 'Of course! What was I thinking? He can't like ME' I say to myself.

Aria: That is not the way we raised you! Wipe that tear this instant!
Arthur: That is no way for a princess to act! You shall not cry! Suck it up!
Louis: SUCK IT UP!
Aria: SUCK IT UP, pumpkin!

I quickly wipe my tear and try to compose myself. I feel a hand on my back. I jump a little at the touch and turn around. I find Technoblade with a concern look on his face. "Are you alright, dear?" He says offering a sad smile. "Yeah im fine- leave me alone!" I said shouting a bit. He removed his hand from my back and looked a bit confused. "I was just asking-" "im fine! Get away from me blood god" I said? No I didn't! I didn't mean it. Techno's expression suddenly changed from a soft and concerned look to a angry and confused face there was also a hint of sadness in his expression. He got up and left leaving me alone.

'Why did you say that!' I asked the voices.

Aria: We only said what had to be said. He is a KILLER!

No! He is much more than that to me! I- I love him...

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I didn't really have time to re-read this chapter so if there any mistakes or something that doesn't make sense I'm very sorry. I hope you enjoyed it nonetheless.

My school is finally over so that could mean more chapters because I'm less busy OR pretty much the same amount because I'll be spending more time with friend and family.

Anyways, I'm not sure if I'll post another chapter this week because like I said in my most recent chapter, I need a little break. But if I do post a chapter it'll probably be short.

Has someone told you yet how nice your hair is? It looks wonderful and it suits you perfectly!

Here is your reminder to do these things if you haven't yet:

-to outside
-take a shower/bath
-take your medication (if you have some)
-take a walk
-drink water
-eat something
-RELAX

Please remember that you are so amazing and so SOOO many people love and appreciate you! I am so proud of you! Please keep fighting!

{1100 words}