Hurt Me Twice

Chapter 17

"Love is everything"- Ariana Grande

It's new year's eve; Meaghan was picking out a dress for me, we were going out to a fancy hotel, for dinner, but my sister had booked a suite in case they were too drunk to drive back home. Traffic would be impossible to shed, making it harder to call a taxi.

"At least help me pick a color?" Meaghan whined as she raided her closet and I flipped through a magazine.

"I really don't care what color the dress is." I said nonchalantly.

"Fine then, here you go." She handed me a mini white dress, backless and strapless. I squinted at her.

"I'll freeze in that."

She shook her head and handed me a black chic coat "you'll put that on, and once inside you'll take it off. I'm not gonna send you half naked through the snow, baby sister, relax"

I undressed and put it on, then Meaghan zipped me up and handed me a pair of black velvet high heels. I put on a bit of eye liner, and some light pink lip gloss, which I quickly removed because it won't hold anyways, with all the eating and drinking and kissing Nate.

As I descended the staircase the doorbell rang. Brian had opened it and was greeting Nate, Jay and Alexis. "You guys ready?" he called out for me and Meaghan but I was on my way down, so it was mainly for Meaghan.

"Okay, WOW!" Alexis shrieked at me and I waved a hand to dismiss her compliment.

"Please, wow yourself" I winked at her and gave her a hug. "Nathan." I turned around and smiled at him.

"You look amazing" he returned the smile.

"Thank you! You look kinda awesome too!" I returned the compliment then went on to give my brother a hug.

After the greetings, my sister had finished getting all dolled up and we were on our way.

Dinner was full of laughter and bickering. Nathan's hand rested around my shoulders as I snuggled into his chest as we waited for dessert. The rest of our table went to the dance floor but I wasn't comfortable enough in heels to dance.

"How are you feeling?" he asked me slowly

I backed away to look into his eyes "What do you mean?"

"Do you want to go elsewhere?"

"I'd rather be somewhere quieter but I'm fine here."

"Come on." He took my hand and led me towards my sister and her husband "Room card?" he asked Brian over the loud music. He nodded handing him the card and Meaghan eyed me suspiciously. I gestured for her to come closer "I just want to rest a little; I'm feeling a bit off."

"Did you take your meds?" she asked close to my ear, before I could tell her that I forgot them at home, Nathan was leading me away from the chaos and into a calm elevator that left my ears ringing from the contrast of calm compared to the noise inside.

When we reached our floor and went into the room, Nathan took his jacket off and I took my heels off.

"How'd you know?" I asked making my way to the kitchen counter in the huge suite.

"You were shaking." He said as he followed me.

"I was?" I raked my fingers through my tangled hair.

"And you kept doing that." He pointed at me and frowned.

"I just feel very anxious and down."

"Did you take your medicine?"

"Not since Christmas." I confessed.

He sighed but didn't push the topic further, and for that I was grateful. But I still felt like I owed him an explanation. "I just was feeling too good to take them."

"Macy, you can't do that..."

"Nathan... please, I don't need scolding right now." I held my hand up to shut him up.

"Then what do you need?"

I looked at him long and hard "You."

At that he walked over to me and gave me a tight hug "I'm not going anywhere, baby."

"I love you" I breathed

"And I love you" he traced his lips across my neck before planting one behind my ear. "come on, let's get some rest." We found a bed and snuggled into each other's arms.

"What time is it?"

"11:30." He said kissing the top of my head.

"I don't wanna sleep before the New Year is here."

"We'll talk." He drew small circles on my shoulder and I felt suddenly serene

"Is this enough?" 

"What do you mean?" he sounded confused

"The fact that we don't get too physical... is that okay with you?"

"Where is this coming from?"

"Ryden can give you a lot more than I can or ever will." I felt a kick in my stomach as I said the words.

"Baby, all that you give me is more than enough. And I would wait forever for you. Don't feel like you're ever pressured with me." He pulled me up to look at my face before kissing my forehead.

I smiled as I closed my eyes, reveling in everything his touch makes me feel. "Good, because I insist on waiting..." he heard that before but I couldn't help but say it.

"Here." He fished out a folded tissue.

I eyed it then him. "I'm not gonna cry." I teased him

He half smiled and opened it and it carried 2 pills. "I always carry them around just in case you need them"

I swallowed my two tiny pills with a gulp of water and pounced at Nathan, straddling him "You. Are.Perfect!" I stressed on every word and unbuttoned his shirt as I kissed him

"What are you doing?" he backed away

"If we can't have the sex part right now, why not try the after sex part." I finished unbuttoning his shirt "unzip me" I demanded. He hesitated at first but then he obliged.

After we got rid of our clothes he got up to get us shots from the mini fridge. I stared shamelessly at his almost naked body, and found myself fantasizing about him.

We downed the shots, and got under the sheets, cuddling close. "Sorry if this is like a tease." I whispered and he kissed my forehead as his fingers traced mini circles on my thighs.

"Do you trust me?" he asked

"Blindly." As I uttered the word he leaned in to take my lips in his passionately and moved his hand to the hem of my panties. Through the thin fabric he started to pleasure me carefully and slowly, deepening the kiss. I noticed his other hand working on himself, he didn't even pressure me into giving him the sort of pleasure he was giving me. I bit on his lower lip as I shuddered with intensity and he rasped out my name as well. That was the first time Nathan touched me like that and I nestled deeper into his embrace but he backed away to look into my eyes.

"You okay?"

"Perfectly." At my single word he flashed me his brightest smile and leaned in to kiss me intensely. I am not sure how long we kissed, but we stopped when we heard fireworks and got out of bed to look at them through our window.

"Happy new Year, Macy."

"Happy new year, baby." 

That's how I've spent new year's eve, one of the very few memorable nights in my life.