Patient Enough? (On Hold)

17

A/N, Kinda a vent: Hey there readers! I'm back after a year, which is a long time and I apologize for that. I had this chapter in my drafts for a while, never having the motivation to finish or publish it till now.

I've been dealing with some stuff this past year. For one, I started to stop going to school because my social anxiety got the better of me and eventually I got kicked out. I honestly feel like a failure but who gives a shit right? Anyway, I was lucky enough to get a place in a different type of school to start learning to be an assistant, which starts in September.

Man, I'm gonna turn 20 this year and what am I doing with my life? getting kicked out of school and writing shitty ass fanfiction, which, I'm pretty sure, mostly gets read by people in the age range of 14-18 (no offense to them). The worst part is I don't even feel alive, I feel numb, like the universe and everything inside, including me, is not real.

Update: It's now October, the first 2 weeks of school I was motivated, I did go every day, ignoring the pit in my stomach that I felt every morning waking up but I started skipping again. I hope I can go the whole next week to school, I really don't want to end up as a failure I would rather die.

Anyways folks enjoy the update and sorry for the vent.

Y/N POV

The next morning...

I feel better, my head doesn't hurt as much as it did yesterday and I don't feel like my body is going to 'shut down'(😏) at any moment. The nurse told me that I could go home in the afternoon but only if my condition doesn't change for the worse.

It's pretty boring to just sit on the bed and do nothing, the only thing I can do is draw, however, I'm not in the mood for it. Technically I could also use my phone but there is no internet here so nothing to do with it. Instead, I decided to walk around the hospital for a bit. It's weird, somehow this place makes me feel peaceful but at the same time really uncomfortable. There are a lot of people here, some of them are visitors most of them are patients. It's kind of shocking to see how many teenagers and kids are here as patients.

"Hey Y/N, wait!",
'I know that voice', I turned around and I was right it was her.
"BFF/N!", she ran towards me with a smile and hugged me tightly.
"Man was I worried about you. I was here yesterday too but you weren't awake then!" I nod. "Yeah I heard that you visited me, I woke up a few hours later, after you left, at least I think so." Her smile turned into worry.
"How are you feeling? like genuinely?" she placed her hands on my shoulders and squeezed them gently.
"I definitely feel a lot better than yesterday, I swear it felt like my head was about to explode when I first woke up." I grabbed my head to empathize my words.

"I'm glad that you feel better but how in the hell were you stupid enough to overdose on painkillers? everyone and their goddamn mother knows you never take more than 1" She removes her hands from my shoulders and places them on her hips, looking sternly at me. I sheepishly scratch the back of my neck feeling a bit embarrassed. "I honestly have no clue" She scoffs at me but her expression softens.
"Well, you better never make that mistake again. I don't wanna end up attending your funeral" I playfully roll my eyes at her.
"Yea yeah, I won't" She gives me a sly smile in response.
"When will you be released?" I shrug.
"Don't know for sure, the nurse said probably in the afternoon, well,  that is if my condition doesn't change" She grins and links her arm with mine.
"Great! I'll be with you in the meantime, obviously only if you don't mind" I return her grin.
"Are you kidding me? ofc I won't mind, it's hella boring here, without any company!"

Sometime later

I just got out of the hospital, luckily I didn't have to walk, BFF/N drove me home.