The Cuckoo's Song

Chapter Twenty-Four

Anna stood over the basin, trying to steady her breathing. Her morning sickness was prolific, and she was exhausted. She rinsed away the evidence, cleaned herself up, then returned to breakfast. Elli was already gone, probably to call for Inge. The housekeeper brought her tea with a huge slice of lemon in it.

"My mother swore by lemon tea to cure vomiting," said Heidi as Anna thanked her for it. "She loved telling me constantly that I would need that advice one day."

"I'm willing to try anything at this point," said Anna, her voice throaty. She sipped the tea slowly, settling back into her chair. "I wasn't sick at all with Reina. Nauseous, perhaps, but not sick. But with this one, I can barely keep anything down."

Gabby gave her an encouraging look. "They say every pregnancy is different."

"True," sighed Anna. "And with different fathers, I suppose it had to be."

There was a silence.

"Well, at least you're not living in sin anymore," joked Heidi.

Anna looked down at the simple gold band on her finger. She missed Abe so terribly. He'd been gone over a week, and she was still coming to terms with it. She wanted desperately to believe that he was safe, and that he would be home soon. But it was foolish to create false hope. She couldn't help but look back on this same time last year. Hans had just left then as well. Perhaps she was always destined to have people leave her in summer? What a morbid thought.

"Anything arrive in the post?" she asked hopefully.

Gabby's face fell. "No, sweetheart. These things will take time..."

Anna had tucked a secret letter to Abe in his bag, so he'd find it when they arrived in Austria. She had hoped that he would have written back by now. She just wanted to know he had arrived safely. And if there were any updates. This was infuriating. She rose from her chair, excusing herself and going outside. She took a deep, calming breath, rubbing her eyes with the heel of her hand. She really didn't want to cry again. She wandered down the road to their favourite bar. She had spent every day there since Abe had left.

As she peered in through the open door, Peter, the barkeeper, glanced up at her and gave her a grin.

"You're getting earlier and earlier these days," he laughed, continuing to sweep the floor.

"Do you mind?"

"Not at all. You know I like having you here."

Anna smiled at him, going over to the piano in the corner.

One night when Abe had taken her to the bar, he had encouraged her to play the piano. Peter had enjoyed it so much that he had invited her back to play whenever she liked. If ever she needed a break from things, she would come here.

Before it was occasional. Now it was constant.

She began by playing 'Georgia on my Mind'; Hollywood had taught it to her. She wanted something that conjured happy, warm feelings for her husband. But as she played, it didn't feel enough. She loved the way this song made him smile, but it wasn't the same when his grin was only a memory.

Anna stopped, looking frustratedly at the keys, racking her brain for what she should play. She sighed, her fingers now going to Elli's song. That felt like a part of her; an extension of her love for her sister. She closed her eyes and let it wash over her.

Then she stopped again.

The tune in her head felt off. There were different notes running through her mind: something that ran just as deeply yet in a different way. This had happened before; when she had begun writing a song last year. She took a deep breath, now playing the notes she was envisaging. There were so few there, a simple string that made a simple tune. But she knew who had brought them forward in her mind.