Carpe Omnia - cash au -

Sweet Seduction

Nash POV

We're standing so close and I can smell Cameron's intoxicating scent. His smile as he tells me about starting medical school is contagious and I find myself smiling back at him. I have to admit to myself that no one can make me smile like Cameron can, but no one can make my heart shatter into pieces like Cameron can.

I try to block that horrible day out of my mind but somehow it always wiggles its way back to the surface of my mind. That day was probably the worst day of my life thus far. I was so excited to spend time with Cameron in our special place and he never bothered to show up or send me a message. We had been together for 3 years and I didn't deserve the way he treated me at the end of our relationship.

My mind drifts to the tattoo that I had permanently etched on my chest, his name right over the area where the heart is. I was so excited to show him and when he dumped me so harshly I felt like such a fool for thinking that we were forever. And yet I never stopped wearing our ring and chains. I never stopped thinking about him. Every morning I look in the mirror and see his name on my skin, I've never had the urge to get laser treatment to erase it, I'll never stop loving him and he'll always have my heart.

I never stopped loving him.

So as we stand here talking quietly, I find myself getting drawn to him.

"I'm so happy you're fulfilling your dreams," I tell him sincerely. He smiles at me, his eyes shine bright with happiness. They're no longer dull and sad like they were when I first went downstairs to look for him.

I didn't mean to let myself get distracted by Kenny, he dragged me away and I stupidly went along with him without another word to Cameron. I'm sure that gave him the wrong idea that I no longer care for him, because I do. After that people just wanted my attention and when I glanced at Cameron he looked unhappy and I felt bad because I knew what changed his mood completely.

Kenny dragged me to my room telling me that he needed to talk to me privately. It wasn't anything important, just about our training schedule and if I wanted to work out with him during the week. When I came back out to finally seek out Cameron to talk to him and apologize, he had left.

I ran downstairs hoping that he hadn't left yet, I felt so relieved when I saw him sitting in the lobby. He was hunched over and his body language screamed defeat and sadness. My heart clenched when I saw him like that because I don't want to cause him unnecessary pain.

So here I am now, standing next to the love of my life, getting to know the man he is now.

"So you're a professional lacrosse player," he comments and I nod with a happy smile on my face.

"You know that it wasn't my plan when we first got to Stanford but the more I played at the college level the more I fell in love with the sport. I was captain from the second semester of freshman year on and that really helped me land a spot on the national team," I tell him and he looks down and seems upset.

"What, Cameron? Talk to me," I prod him and he sighs softly.

"I just... I guess I'm just hurt that you fell in love with it more than you loved me, you know? You left me behind and it broke my heart," he confesses and I rub my eyes because thinking about that period of my life upsets me just as much as it upsets him.

"I know it seems that way, Cameron. But you have to know that I absolutely love you more than Lacrosse. I know that I might not have made the right choice for us and I'm sorry. I just thought our relationship was strong enough to survive the distance for a few years until graduation," I tell him honestly and he tilts his face as he looks at me.