Perfect Storm

Chapter 14

I have not heard from Ryan since the night of the concert. I didn't know what to think. Maybe he was giving me my space since I told him we would talk this weekend or maybe he decided that he was going to stay with Laken after all. We were both drunk that night. Perhaps that's all it was...loss of inhibitions brought about by an excessive quantity of alcohol. Who's to say he even meant the things he said? Maybe he didn't even remember everything that had gone on backstage at that concert. Maybe this was him getting back at me because Lord knows I deserved it.

I had arrived in Talladega this morning, and he had yet to reach out to me, and I really didn't feel it was my place to go to him. I made no promises to him. He didn't didn't owe me any explanation. Hell, he didn't owe me a damn thing. I was the one who walked out on him, so why should I get to show up now and disrupt the life he had built?

Maybe we really didn't have a future together.

Riley Green was putting on a concert in the infield, and any other time I would have been stoked as he was one of my favorite artists, and being a hard card carrying member of a race team gave me unrestricted access to behind the scenes. I just couldn't enjoy it though. My anxiety over Ryan was really getting to me. I was flooded with memories of what had happened backstage at the last concert I had attended. I was also flooded with memories of Ryan and me at yet a different Riley Green concert where we made out more than we paid attention to what was going on on stage. Meanwhile, I listened as Riley played his sexiest song.

When she comes home tonight
We'll take that clock off the wall
Draw all them curtains
Let our clothes just lay where they fall
We'll turn down the lights
And let our hands be our eyes
Be just her and I, we'll take our time
When she comes home tonight

"I should have known I'd find you here. Riley is one of your favorites." The achingly familiar voice coming from behind me in my ear was slightly slurred.

I turned around and could smell the beer on his breath. He couldn't be drunk. He probably just had a couple of beers. Ryan was a stickler for hydrating days before a race and not drinking in excess during race weekend. Yet why were his words slurred? Then he began singing in my ear.

Been a while overdue gettin' her alone
Thought's been drivin' me wild
Killin' time 'til her and I get back
To lovin' like it's goin' out of style
I'm staring at this bottle, awake
And it's on when she pulls in the drive

"Hi." I murmured, literally speechless. This was the moment I had been waiting for since the concert and I couldn't come up with more to say than 'hi'?

"God I've missed you." He crashed his lips onto mine and I drank him in, beer and all. My head was spinning, feeling like I was becoming intoxicated myself. I could stay like this forever, but we needed to talk. I had to tell him everything. He needed to know. He deserved to know, and I knew that what I had to tell him could change everything. I needed to do this before I got too caught up in this kiss that completely lit my soul on fire. A kiss that made me want to drag him away from here to somewhere more private. Somewhere that involved not talking at all so we could live out the song that Riley was singing.

Reluctantly, I broke off the kiss. As I stared into his blue eyes I couldn't help but notice how conflicted they looked, like a sea of emotions swirling in the ocean colored depths.

"There's something I needed to tell you." I blurted out, at the same moment he spoke those exact words. My heart sank because I could see the sorrow and turmoil in his eyes even more.

I was right in my earlier thinking: we had no future together. He was going to tell me everything had been a mistake. The concert, the kiss. All of it.