Blood On Her Hands

Chapter 47

Vincent was waiting for me right where I left him. Before I could think to do anything reckless or dumb, I decided it be best to give him the recording immediately. I took the hand that had been resting at his side and opened it, placing the phone in his palm. 

"The confession's in there."

He looked at the phone and then at me. A small smile stretched onto his lips. "You were right. You figured it out."

I shifted my weight from side to side, wishing I could celebrate like he seemed tempted to. Maybe if my father had been the only one guilty I'd at least felt relieved. Instead, a different burden had settled on my chest.

"Nancy helped him," I said, putting it simply. He would get a fuller picture once he listened to the recording.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When he opened them, all the happiness he must have felt for having gotten another job done had evaporated.

"She'll be away for a while."

I knew that. I knew she would be in jail long enough to lose custody of the baby. I knew she would miss years of the child's life, perhaps the majority of his it her youth. She knew what it was like to grow up with an incarcerated parent and yet she risked abandoning her child for a more luxurious life.

She must have found out about our father's business when she visited our aunt Stephanie. She had denied that she had been the one to give our family the twenty thousand and either Nancy put it together then or Stephanie had been honest with her. There was a chance that Stephanie's deceased husband wasn't solely responsible for the wealth she harbored. Maybe she had a picture of my father up in her house because he had been generous with her too.

Vincent pulled me back into the real world when he squeezed my shoulder. "You did what was right."

My eyes stung with tears and my throat ached. My stomach muscles ached from sobbing. I wanted to cry but I was too exhausted.

"Then why does it feel wrong?" I asked. "Like I'm tearing my family apart?"

Vincent shifted so he could lean against the wall by my side. Through the small, gated windows residing on the ceiling of the facility, thin rays of sunlight slipped through.

"I know it feels that way but I think this is the first step to building a better one."

What was that saying? Things have to get worse before they get better?

I could try and think of my family as built on an unsteady foundation. When pieces of us broke down and chipped, it was because of the foundational error. The little fixes weren't going to last. The glue of momentary relief that came with successful family dinners and getaways weren't enough to keep us together. We had to get to the root of the problem and that was never a comfortable experience.

I wished mending things hadn't come at such a high cost.

"I never want to be like them," I said, my voice wavering. "I want to be better for whoever comes next. A child should be raised with two loving parents. A family shouldn't keep secrets."

Vincent gazed down at me, his eyelashes long and delicate. "You will be better."

"I will be."

And I would.

_____________________

My first stop when I made it back to town was to the hospital. I wanted to see Darren.

Since I knew he wasn't some sort of drug lord or mafia boss, my perspective on who he was had finally settled. He wasn't someone to fear but rather someone who clearly wasn't for me. He had blended too well into my family's unhealthy dynamics. Perhaps that was what attracted me in the first place. He was familiar. But just like I found out with my family, there was a dark underbelly to him.