My Notes To You

30 | Christmas Eve

Aliyia

I'm lying in Zayden's bed with him passed out asleep in my arms. I am still a little disappointed that he didn't tell me about our past together but that doesn't matter right now. What matters is him.

I was coming out to the bathroom when I heard Zayden on the phone with someone. I could hear things along the line of "raising past the age of eleven" and Zayden's stepdad.

I knew about Zayden's father not being in their life anymore. I just never knew why. And honestly, I think it's best if I don't know.

Immediately after I heard him hang up the call I pressed myself onto his door and heard him sobbing. I couldn't just stand there and do nothing. I know he would comfort me so why shouldn't I do the same?

Zayden shuffles in my arms and I can tell he's waking up. My hands are still in his hair. It's so fluffy I can't get enough of it. Zayden's eyes flutter open and he lifts his head to look at me, a smile forming on his lips as he stares at my eyes.

"Hi" I greet him. "Hi" he greets back. He slowly gets off me and lays beside me and I suddenly feel empty. The warmth of him in my arms made me feel good, I miss it.

I move so I'm laying on my side, looking at him. He's smiling like a little kid, looking at me. "Aren't you mad at me?" He asks, wiping his chin. That causes me to smile. "I am mad at you." That is a lie.

I stopped being mad a long time ago. I just wanted to see how long I could go without speaking to him. Not a very long time though. His eyes drift from mine for a moment before they reach the again.

"Thank you," he says, his smile increasing. "For what?" I ask even though I know what. "For comforting me, I needed that."

My smile increases as well. His hand suddenly reaches out to push my hair behind my air and I swear I can feel butterflies flying around my stomach. We were so close to each other. My heartbeat increased and it felt like it would plop out of my chest at any moment.

"I can't sleep anymore," he tells me. It's nighttime now, he slept for an hour while I stayed up to make sure nothing happened to him.

"Well I can, I'm gonna go, okay?" I want him to tell me to stay. I don't know why but I want him to. If he told me to then I would. "Can you sleep here tonight?" He asks, his eyes never leaving mine. Thank God.

"Well if you insist" I shrug and close my eyes. I discreetly open my eyes to see him staring at me. Yeah, no way. I turn around so my back is faced to him. "I can't sleep knowing you're staring at me, Zayden."

My heart was beating fast. That earned a chuckle from him. "Goodnight, Ali" he mumbles. I turn my head for a moment to get a glance at him but of course, he's looking right at me. I quickly turn around and try hiding my smile.

"Goodnight, Zayden." My mind is clouded with thoughts for a good ten minutes before I finally drift off to sleep.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

My eyes slowly start to open. When I reach full conscientious, I can feel a pair of arms wrapped around my waist. I turn my head and I'm met with Zayden's sleeping figure.

He looks so calm, and safe. His mouth is slightly open and there's a little bit of drool dripping onto the corners of his mouth.

I never knew someone could look so good, even in their sleep. I did not just say that.

I don't want to disturb him while he sleeps so I refrain from getting up. Instead, I reach over to grab my phone from the nightstand.