his shadow | eddie munson

↝ chapter ten

for whom the bell tolls - metallica
11 | turning back
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when maude awoke, the sun was ablaze in the sky and it kissed her face gracefully. the radio was back on, heavy rock music playing at a soft volume, and eddie was humming the lyrics under his breath. when maude sat up, she blinked at the road ahead as her eyes adjusted to the light.

"did you always let your uncle treat you like that?" eddie asked suddenly, aware that maude had just woken up.

maude thought back to the gas station, and how eddie had witnessed her uncle speak to her unkindly and touch her inappropriately. she bowed her head, embarrassed. "he's never gone... further."

when she glanced over at eddie, his face was firm. "i've lived with him and his sons— my cousins, since i was eight. my mother dropped me off one day, promised me it was only for a little bit..." she thought to open up a bit, since it was only fair he knew some things about her after she stalked him for almost a year. "but she never came back for me. my uncle despised me for this... but his sons were from two seperate mothers, so there was no female presence around the house to do the cooking and cleaning and all that stuff— so he made me useful."

"that's some cinderella-type shit," eddie commented with a frown. "are your cousins like him?"

"from day one they were all unkind to me, but it got worse over the years..." maude fell into a memory. she didn't know what possessed her, but she began telling it to eddie. "one night, i remember my uncle coming home very drunk, and he called us all into the lounge and gave us a cigarette each, told us it was to be our first of many. my cousins, dean and brad, were excited by this— dean was thirteen and brad was the same age as me, which was ten. i didn't want it, even after my uncle cursed at me to take it, to put it between my lips and let him light it..."

"i remember throwing it to the ground. it wasn't a smart move, but i was ten— i didn't know any better," maude played with her shaking fingers as she retold the memory. "i angered him, a lot. he pushed me down to the floor and ordered my cousins to hold me there, then he lit the cigarette i'd discarded, and he... he lifted my top and pressed the burning stub to my stomach. i screamed, and they all just laughed at me."

she began sniffling as unwanted tears threatened to spill, and she wiped at them angrily. "they made a habit out of this. every time they had a cigarette, they'd put it out on my skin. i have scars— burn marks, all over my stomach and legs," her hands slid just below her throat, "my chest..."

eddie cursed all three of them and wished ungodly things upon them, his face dark with disgust. "you should've gotten out of there, maude."

she frowned. "i didn't have anywhere to go."

his face twisted with understanding. "that's why you chose to run at the gas station? you felt that was your only opportunity?"

maude nodded. "i thought i only did it because i recognised you... but a part of me believes that if it had been anyone else, i still would have done it. i still would have ran, even if it put me in greater danger..." he paused to consider this for a moment, and frowned. "i don't think anything could be worse than what i endured living with them, though."

"how did i never notice you in school?" eddie looked at her for a moment too long. the van leered too close to the curb before he regained control and focused on his driving.

maude shrugged slightly. "it was the way i wanted it. i was a wallflower, i didn't have any friends, didn't speak to anyone if it wasn't necessary. i hung in the library for years until this, until i began sitting in the cafeteria to—"