Warning: this chapter deals with alcohol consumption, peer pressure, and overall just basic american teen party scenario (except i have never been to that kind of party so its based purely on whats portrayed in media)
And so, Twilit Sperkle and co trotted into the gala. Except this gala is a bit different than you might expect. Probably because the author has not watched mlp in years and doesn't remember the gala episode at all so decided to improvise.
It was incredibly crowded. Music blared from the speakers as several ponies shook around on the dance floor. Others stood around chatting and drinking some mystery liquid from their red solo cups. Everyone seemed to be partying like there was no tomorrow
"oMGGG PARTYYYY" screamed Ponkeh Pooh as she bounced away to join in the fun.
The others soon joined in and mingled with the crowd, hoping to have a good time, or maybe even to find love.
Before Twilit could come to terms with what kind of situation she just got herself into, she was approached by none other than Pinces Cooestia.
"Ayyyy hello my faful sdudenttt Twilit my girl my bestie hell frickin oh" she said, her speech slightly slurred.
"Umm hi? Are you ok pinces?"
"Oh twilit, my dude, I have never felt more alive. I mean I have, but like, yeahh"
Cooestia took another swig from her glass. She's a princess, so obviously she wouldn't just use a red solo cup like a peasant. She pulled the glass away from her horse lips and let out a roar.
"hWOOO Twilit you knEAD to get a load of this stuff"
"What kind of potion is that?"
"Ts not a potion you nerdy prude, irs an alchaholic befredge. Ever seen one?"
"Well what's in it?"
"pURE FULE"
"Is that a stranger tings refrence? You know that referencing something relevant rn isn't gonna make this fic any less cringe than it already is, right?"
"Shut up you absolute purple unicorn who tf cares whats in it just drink it"
"But i have a lot to do tomorrow and i was always told as a filly not to take drinks from strangers and-"
"oH MY FRICKIN ME, SHUT UP AND JUST HAVE SOME FUN FOR ONCE IN YOUR MISERABLE LIFE"
With that, Cooestia shoved her drink in Twilit's face and walked away. Deciding she didn't have much to lose, Twilit gave in and took a sip.
She immediately spit it out.
"Ugh that's what alcohol tastes like?? How does she drink this stuff?"
Feeling more than a bit out of her element, Twilit decided to take a look around and get an idea of what the others are up to. Outside the window, she spotted Flootershah chatting it up with a fellow wearing a pair of cat ears over their horse ears. The two of them seemed to be hitting it off quite well. Twilit turned to see Rarty flirting with another young colt. Down the hall, Rombow Dah was hiding behind a potted plant and snapping pics of the Wonderbols. Letting out a sigh, Twilit made her way to a corner to get a break from all the noise and chaos around her.
Pinces Cooestia made her way to the dance floor and wrestled the mic away from the DJ's hands. Wait, ponies dont have hands. Pinces Cooestia wrestled the mic away from the DJ's hooves which are somehow able to hold things.
"hEllo everyone how are yall doing tonight?!!!!!!"
Silence.
"Ohh waittt frick. I mean, hello everyPONY how are yall doing tonight"
The crowd cheers and Twilit rolls her eyes.
"I, your beloved pinces, am here to announce a couple things. FIRST, Twilit Sperkle is a nerdy prude who doesn't know how to have fun and always waits until the last minute to give me her rent."
All but Twilit explode with laughter (but not literally, obviously).
"SECOND, everyon-pony give a warm welcome to my NEW bestie, Ponkeh Pooh, who will be singing for us tonight"
"Oh deer god no" Twilit says as everyone else cheers.
Ponkeh Pooh grabs the mic and takes a deep breath.
THE FOALS ARE GONE
ITS TIME FOR BIG FUN BIG FUN
WERE UP TILL DAWN
HAVING SOME BIG FUN BIG FUN
WHEN TWIL. SPERKLE FORGETS TO LOCK THE LICKER CABENITS
ITS BIG FUN BIG FUN
BIG FUN
"Please tell me shes not quoting Heathers in 2022." Twilit sighed as she bowed her head in defeat.
"I mean it was popular at the time this fic first started"
Twilit turned to see Rarty standing at her side.
"What are you doing over here with me? I thought you found a cute colt to talk to." Asked Twilit.
"Oh he was suuuuuch a loser. I tried to look past his hideous outfit but then I found out he likes popsicles more than ice cream."
Twilit looked at her, puzzled.
"And, he only washes his mane once per day! I wouldn't dare associate myself with someone like that. I mean, don't get me wrong. You are one of the biggest losers i know. But at least you keep your mane clean."
Twilit didn't have the heart to tell her that she only washes her mane a couple times a week. Rarty continues to complain.
"And that punch! Who thought it would be a good idea to mix tequila with beer and agave and, what else is in there? Lime juice? This stuff tastes like it was made by Steven Lim!"
"Wait whos Steven Lim? And how could you figure out the ingredients?"
"Dont worry about that, lets just ditch this absolute dump."
"Wait are we just gonna leave everyone else here?"
"Yeah?"
"Ok sweet"
And so, the two set off on a great journey. And by great journey I mean that they got a carriage home and went to sleep.
YOU ARE READING
My Derp Pony: Frenship is Moogic
FanfictionThis is a crack fic I started writing in middle school. I wrote the first three chapters and then abandoned it. Now, about 5 years later, I decided to continue it; despite the fact that I have not written anything since then. Basically, don't expect...
