Ghosts (Camren)

Chapter 4

Friday was a day of firsts. Well, not totally new firsts... But firsts in a while.

It was the first time I woke up with a smile on my face in months. This date I had with Camila tonight was actually making me giddy. Excitement was what got me through the day. As tedious as school was, I didn't let my good mood falter. I was determined to be in high spirits for Camila. I owed her that much.

It was the first time I'd actually put some thought into my outfit and appearance. I wasn't wearing band shirts and leggings like I usually would. I attempted to look good. Not official date good, but casual good. This was a casual thing, right? On this lovely day, I was dressed in a pastel white dress. Nothing too formal, but I didn't look like I'd just rolled out of bed for once. There wasn't much process that went into getting dressed, despite the fact that I put some effort into it.

I couldn't even recall the last date I'd been on. It was with a boy, but even his name had slipped my mind. Dates with girls and boys alike came and went like clockwork. There was this one period where I just kind of threw myself at anyone who showed me a little attention. It was just another mode of distraction from Normani for a little while. But none of that mattered. I was going on a date with Camila this evening. The difference with her was that I was actually sort of willing to give this a shot.

-

"So I'm guessing this is just like a little get-to-know-eachother-better date, right?" Camila inferred after paying for our icecream. The smaller girl was now sitting across from me, smiling, but looking nervous as well, which was refreshing because I felt the same way.

"I suppose," I nodded tentatively, fiddling with my fingers in my lap.

I kept playing with the strings on my dress. My outfit decision was somewhat correct. This was a casual date. As I stole several glances at Camila, I saw that her outfit was casual as well. She was wearing a blue blouse and some checkered pants that I didn't really think would go well together, but she managed to pull it off in a weird way. Cutie.

"Okay, good. Because I didn't want you to think that I was seriously asking you out... I know you'd probably think I'm poor because I never seem to have money, but if I was going to ask you out for real, I'd do something nicer than a ratty old Coldstone," she rambled.

"I like this ratty old Coldstone," I countered with a smirk.

"I like you," Camila grinned as she grasped her spoon without breaking eye contact.

Her confession caught me off guard a little, although I guess it should've been implied if I was on a date with her - regardless of the nature.

"You're alright yourself," I shrugged, returning her compliment - but not as seriously. I didn't like her.

"Just alright? Shoot, I thought I was doing pretty good," Camila pouted, and I was so tempted to take a picture. How could someone be that cute?

"No, you are," I admitted to her, figuring it didn't lead her on or anything.

"Is this good? Like, are you enjoying yourself?" Camila asked for clarity. While waiting for my response, she began playing with her spoon, twisting it into the icecream.

"Yeah, of course I am," I nodded. That wasn't a total lie, but it wasn't the honest truth either. Camila was funny, sweet, and everything in between, but she just reminded me so much of the dark-eyed girl that had my heart. Those beautiful big brown ones weren't Normani's. Nothing was Normani. God, I needed to stop.

"Are you sure?" Camila tilted her head to the side, gazing at me intently. I think she knew.

"Camila, why'd you ask me out here?" I asked suddenly. "Like, we just met..."