vinnie hacker imagines

love you till the end

TRIGGER WARNING: SUICIDE ATTEMPT.

"How do you feel today?" Vinnie asked his
girlfriend.

She shrugged. She didn't know.

"Well are you happy?" Vinnie asked.

Once again, she shrugged.

"Are you sad?"

Another shrug of her shoulders only pissed him off. Not because he was upset that she didn't know, but because he had no idea how to help her.

"Are you excited? Tired? You have to be feeling something." Vinnie pried.

"I told you I don't know." Avery mumbled, her voice soft.

"How don't you know?" Vinnie asked.

"I just don't know." Avery shrugged again.

"Okay, well are you hungry? Do you want to get food with me?" Vinnie asked.

"I'm not hungry. I'll go with you though." Avery said.

"There's no point in you going if you aren't hungry." Vinnie said, and with that he walked out the door.

Which left her to feel even more numb than she did before. Picking at a lose thread on the hoodie she was wearing, she let her mind take over. Letting her thoughts get the best of her.

She feared he was growing tired of her.

That he didn't love her anymore.

That he didn't want to deal with her.

That her depression was too much for him to deal with.

That she was only holding him back.

That she would be like her mother, not making it past the age of 21.

That she would leave everyone behind like her mother did to her, leaving them to feel empty and broken.

That she would have to sleep in a bed without Vinnie.

That he had found someone new.

That her depression would never go away.

And she was so consumed by these thoughts that she didn't realize that Vinnie was back. Or that tears were soaking her pillows. That tears made her eyes look glassy.

"Avery!" Vinnie shouted, finally pulling her from her trance like state.

"What?" Avery asked, flipping over and wiping tears from her face.

"What's the matter?" Vinnie asked, yet his voice held no concern.

"I was just thinking. Nothing serious. What did you get to eat?" Avery said, sitting up in the bed for the first time today.

"Nothing for you, you said you weren't hungry." Vinnie said.

"I know, I meant what did you get yourself to eat." Avery explained.

"Panda Express. But I already ate it." Vinnie said.

"Oh okay." Avery nodded, standing up and walking into the bathroom.

She avoided looking in the mirror at herself. However, she was forced to do so as she washed her hands after using the toilet.

Her reflection didn't look like herself. This girl, the one in the mirror, was broken. She was tired. She was afraid. She was pale. She was too skinny, but also too fat. She had huge bags under her eyes. She was fearful.

The girl in the mirror scared her.

Was she giving up?

She shook the thought away and decided to wash her face and do her makeup. Maybe her and Vinnie could go out to do something, or so she thought.