My Daddy "The Fonz"

Chapter 12/Part 5: Start of the Aftermath

Fonzie's POV:

Well, what the hell did I do to deserve this? I was simply just trying to have Spike enjoy his first real birthday with some real family. Is that so bad? And Richie really bombed this one. Way to show me you can handle Bobby. I suppose I wouldn't do any better anyhow. The kid was out of his freakin' mind today. And as I survey the dining room, everyone's out of their freakin' minds. Mrs. C–fretting over the mess in the kitchen. Mr. C–shaking his head into his newspaper as he listens to Mrs. C's fretting. Richie–obviously mutterin' and moanin' to himself about how he "can't do anything right." Potsie and Ralph–being Potsie and Ralph. The little Shortcake's still in time out, blushing red as a stop sign because she was sent to the corner in front of her boy toy, Chachi. Chachi–well, my cousin's always finding ways to seem cool, gets it from me.

And here I am, trying my darnedest not to flip out as I try to hold Spike in my arms to keep him from speeding outside and tearing Bobby's head off. I don't blame him either for feeling that way. I probably should eventually find Bobs, but it's sort of hard when I've got this other kid in my grasp.

"Richie," I call, gesturing for him to come my way. "C'mere."

He shakes his head. "Nah, Fonzie. I'm too peeved off. I can't be talking about this right now. Just give me some time." The lad is pacing like he's lost his last marble.

I sigh. "Richie," I groan. "It ain't a big deal. The boy's causing trouble. That's what boys do. Don't be so hard on yourself. And would you do me a favor? I'm tryin' to subdue Spike. Can you go check on Bobby?"

Richie gives me this "you better not have asked me that" glare. Wow. What balls to challenge me like that. He must really be upset. I guess I'll give him a pass, just this once...But hell no, I won't. I won't take that from nobody, not even Richie. Not. Even. My bro. Richie.

"Excu-hu-huse me?" I hoot. "Did you just–say NO to the Fonz? That hurts, Richard. I thought we were friends."

Richie's face glows redder than Joanie's. "Are you SERIOUS? Fonzarelli, I do fuckin' everything for you. Everything. You say 'lie down.' I lie down. You say 'roll over.' I do that too. Well, not any more, Fonzie. This is the last straw. I am not a parent. I can't be a parent, especially not to your kids. Hell, I'm still a kid. I'm barely seventeen, for Pete's sake. What do you expect from me? The world, apparently."

I've gotta say, I'm actually quite taken aback by this. Getting steadily more angry, I set Spike down and launch myself toward him. "How dare you–" My finger jabs into his shoulder with every word. "How. Dare. You. I've done everything for this family. You were just returning the favor. It's called FRIENDSHIP, dude. I scratch your back. You scratch mine. I've fixed your car how many times? Like, a thousand? I've watched Joanie for you when your parents were out so you could go on dates. I've coached you about said dates. I've helped you with your confidence. I was your shoulder to cry on when you got dumped. Your mentor. I've been there through rain, shine or pour, Richie. Why the hell are you giving me this shit?" I didn't realize I had been huffing so hard and gotten so loud, but I look around and the room is still, all staring at me.

Richie gets right in my face, obviously wanting a fat lip. "No, Fonzie, how dare YOU! I can't believe you. All this time, since Spike has lived with you, Bobby has been crying to me because you just don't give him enough attention. The boy's nine, Fonz. He needs you, not me. And I don't care that you've 'had' to spend more time with Spike. Spike's still older and more independent than Bobby. It's not fair how you've been doting on him and completely neglecting Bobby. That's a bad dad if I ever saw one. Totally wrong."

I step toward the lad, rearing up to show him what Heaven looks like. I can hear Joanie chanting, "Fight. Fight. Fight!" Then Chachi, Ralph and Potsie join in. Well, they just might get their wish.