Chapter 1

3.6K 53 12
                                    

*uploading again. Probably will be deleted once again. 🙄


The bass played into the room, breaking the awkward silence. I could feel it vibrating, almost like it was penetrating to my bones. Fuck, I loved this song. The lyrics hit home, but his voice just gave me the most intense goosebumps. I've missed this.

"God, Maddie...baby." My boyfriend, Kyle, hummed against my skin.

Speaking of penetrating. I groan internally, my eyes rolling back as far as they can physically go. He interrupted my song. I'm so thankful I begged to keep the lights of so he could not see my lack of pleasure during this little session. Sex with Kyle had never been fireworks, but in the last six months I couldn't even get close to having an orgasm. Just him calling out my name instantly annoyed me.

I could tell tonight was going to be like all the rest, I was nowhere near close to that cliff of pleasure and he was already teetering over the edge. I brought out my best acting skills as I moaned and arched my body for him in hopes he would let go and finally be pushed over that edge. his hips lost their rhythm, and I knew I was right. Kyle let out one last moan before collapsing on top of me, his body completely dead weight above me.

I gently push him and groan. "Kyle, I can't breathe."
He rolled to the side, so he was lying next to me. Just as his arm went to wrap around me, I scoot out of bed.

"Be right back." I whispered and hurried out of his reach, not waiting for his response. I rush to the bathroom on tip toe.

I lean back against the bathroom door after locking it, letting go of all my frustrations in that moment. Why did I keep doing this to myself? Why did I stay with someone who made me numb? For a while I thought my vagina was broken, however it's not. All my feelings are numb. It's not just sex that's broken in this relationship. Kyle tries to control everything.

Even when it came to my name. My name is Madison, but Kyle has always called me Maddie. Even when I had specifically told him how much I hated it. Although Kyle never hurt me physically, he was most definitely abusive in other ways. he dictated what music I listened to, the clothing I wore, which friend I could hang out with and when. This is not the woman I was raised to be. My mother would be so disappointed if she knew, not that she's ever been particularly proud of me.

I stay with Kyle because I'm afraid to start all over with someone just to have them turn and change the way he did. Our relationship had started out so normal, in the beginning he was actually sweet. Then things just changed over time, and he made me believe it's what I deserved. I should change to suit what he wanted in a girl, I owed him that. Now I do not even know who the hell I am anymore.

"Babe!" Kyles voice breaks through my thoughts. I flush the toilet and run the water for a few moments to make it seem like I had gone for a reason. Taking a deep breath, I opened the door and made my way back to bed.

When I woke up the bed was empty. I was not surprised though; Kyle's workday has always started much earlier than mine. I reach over and grab my phone, checking though my emails and notifications. I had gotten a text from my best friend Lindsay; a friend Kyle did not particularly care for.

Lindsay: Girl. Did you see who is coming to Wolstein Center?!

I tilt my head in confusion. I exit out of the text and go to search on the tickets sales online for Wolstein Center. I scroll seeing nothing of interest until I see his name.

Machine Gun Kelly, Hotel Chaos Tour

I sit up and squeal in excitement. "Ohh my fucking God!"

I return to my messages.

BaddestWhere stories live. Discover now