When Blindfolds Fall

8: All I Care About

Viktor had spent the rest of the night locked up in his office, and whilst his first impulse was to go find someone else to cure his heat, he ignored it. The plea from Josiah to not sleep with someone else still held him back and he was irked that it did.

Josiah was simply a sex partner, nothing more. Just a partner that happened to stick around longer than the rest. Just someone he felt a duty to guard his happiness no matter the cost.

Alas, no matter the cost.

For Viktor it was costing him the little emotional stability he had built up over the years, although, to call it stability would be wrong. The correct term should be emotional numbness.

It's the only way he survived past his wife's death, past every murder he committed, and dealt with all his inner demons.

But Josiah, that cursed kind man was bringing it all back and he couldn't stop it.

Every time Viktor tried to think about his work and be productive, the sound of Josiah's cries echoed in his ears and made him rub his forehead forcefully. He couldn't stop thinking about him, specially considering he just left without an explanation and God knew how that made him feel.

"I really hate you Josiah." Viktor thought exasperated as he got up from his desk. "I really do. But there's no use denying it."

Resigned, Viktor exited his office and the infirmary, and went towards his room in hopes of catching Josiah there. Although, now he was uneasy at the thought that he may not be there anymore.

When the doctor reached his room, he was about to knock on the door when he suddenly caught the smell of cigarette smoke coming from within. He skipped the polite knocking and barged inside the room, only to find the man he was looking for sitting up naked with only the sheets wrapped around his waist.

Josiah wasn't facing the door, instead, he was staring at the wall as he huffed out a cloud of smoke. He frowned at the cigarette in disgust and put it out on the ashtray next to the bed.

"However do you put up with such a nasty habit Viktor?" Josiah spoke up without turning to face him. "You make it seem so addictive and yet I don't see what's the big idea about smoking."

"I didn't know you smoked." Viktor said quietly.

"I don't, and I have no intention of getting into it for your sake."

Viktor was at a loss on how to tread around Josiah right now. He was upset, that much was clear, but how upset and over what exactly were the questions.

"Have I upset you Josiah?" Viktor raised his posture and took a step forward.

"Stay where you are, I don't want your swine attitude to rub off on me." Josiah demanded and the insult made Viktor more surprised than offended. The ambassador was not a man of insults or sarcasm.

"Josiah, just tell me--"

"You should know. After all you were there."

"Is this about not prepping you before penetrating you?"

Finally, that seemed to encourage Josiah to turn around, so he did and glared furiously at him.

"You have such a great audacity Viktor that you're just not as tall as it is because you're biology forbids it!" Josiah snapped. "No, you insensitive prick, it is not about you not prepping me before shoving your penis up my butt! I am upset because after all this time you're still a coward and a liar!"

Viktor reacted this time and scowled in anger at Josiah. Both were mirroring the other's expression.

"Well, if I am a coward and liar, do enlighten me Josiah." Viktor made a bitter smile. "Accodding to you, I'm too stupid to know why."