Should′ve never let you go

Love can be frightening

My makeup ran down my cheeks, I plucked the pins out of my hair. I looked like piles of misery, and i did feel like that. I didn't know what else I could do. On the one hand, I loved Steve and he made an effort, but on the other hand, he always lowered me so much.

I didn't want to throw away my relationship, I wanted it to work. 6 years, just throwing it away was not an option for me. So I picked myself up and put on something else. I grabbed my evening tea from the kitchen and sat down next to Steve on the couch. I cuddled up to him without a word and he put his arm around me. we sat there, a few minutes ago he yelled at me and now, now we were inseparable again. I couldn't deal with this quarrelling, I wanted to maintain harmony. I stared at the same spot for minutes, lost all the feeling of time and could only remember going to bed the next morning. I woke up by the ringing of my cell phone, my alarm clock. I looked at the time, 10 a.m. I rubbed my face, in which makeup was still hanging. I found myself alone in bed and decided to take a cold shower without further ado, which certainly helped me to have a clear thought again. So I swung myself in the shower and turned the water as cold as possible and gasped for air, while the cold water ran over my body, I heard my cell phone ringing and looked over to our washbasin. An "H" lit up on the display and made my heart jump higher. I obviously couldn't go straight to it and decided to run some music. Music helped me to process my feelings and emotions. So I ordered Siri to run on spotify. The first song that played was "Late Night Talking" by Harry Styles, I smiled and listened to his lines. Again it reminded me of everything that was. It was just nice to think about it again and again. How free we were and how well we were because we had each other. When I was finished in the shower, I wrapped one towel tightly while I tied the other around my head, I continued dancing to Harry's words. I was torn out of my small concert by the bell at the door. A little panicked, I ran down the stairs and opened the door a gap. "Harry?" I asked in amazement while looking into dark sunglasses. „What are you doing here?" I was actually a little angry because I knew exactly how Steve would react if he knew about it. I stepped aside a bit and let him in, after all no one should see him. „You can't just show up here! What if someone sees you?!" I was a little effervescent at that moment and hardly let Harry have his say. He pushed his sunglasses into his hair and pulled up the sleeves of his dark brown sweatshirt. „You didn't go to your cell phone for hours, what else should I do? I was worried!" Harry also seemed upset, I understood that he was worried, but he couldn't just show up if it suited him. I breathed deeply through "Okey, watch out. I'm sorry I didn't get in touch, but as you can see, I was busy!" I pointed to the towels that only covered me at that moment. Of course, Harry's gaze didn't escape me and I looked at him with his eyebrow raised "emery, as I know you, you were exactly 20 minutes under the shower and danced the rest around here" fuck! This man just knew me too well. „Well, thank you for this valuable contribution, I would be grateful if you could leave now!" I finally had enough self-confidence to last. Harry took me seriously, he respected my decisions and knew that I just didn't kick him out because I didn't want to see him. „Please get in touch later" he said before he left my house again. I ran up the stairs and threw the one towel from me. I put on some t-shirt and shorts and threw myself on the sofa with my cell phone. Immediately I opened Harry's chat and started writing to him, "hey, sorry, I didn't want to sound mean. You know what Steve is like. I just want to avoid unnecessary stress❤️" when my finger touched the button to send, my cell phone rang again. Harry. Who else should it be? "Yes?" I answered briefly and concisely, while Harry already invited me for the afternoon.