One Last Try [HP Jamione fanfic]

46. Mean

16th March 1978

"ARE YOU-"

"Fucking."

"-KIDDING ME?! YOU-"

"Fucking."

"IDIOT!"

Peter blinked a few times, incredulous gaze flitting between Sirius and James. Sirius was scowling at the youngest Marauder. James stood behind him, an amused look on his face.

"...What was that?" Peter asked after a long pause and awkward silence.

James rolled his eyes, and in the same deadpan voice he'd used for the swear words, explained to Peter. "Remus banned Sirius from swearing as his birthday present, so I volunteered to help him out."

Peter blinked again, wondering - not for the first time - what on earth got into his friends sometimes. He didn't blame Frank for choosing the much more sensible Hermione as his best friend over the other Marauders. (This was ignoring of course, the equal amount of insanity Peter added to their small group). "So you're swearing for Pads?" He asked incredulously, trying to wrap his head around what was going on.

"I am right here." Sirius said petulantly to his two friends talking over his head. He should've been used to it happening considering he was shorter than Remus, James, and Frank, and only had a couple of inches on Peter.

"What does Moony get out of banning you from swearing?" Peter asked, kind of amused now at all the possibilities.

"Endless amusement." Said werewolf interjected with a grin, pushing the door to their dormitory open with one hand, a large slab of chocolate in the other. Peter noticed the way Remus' eyes darted frequently towards the Black heir, a strange look in the blue depths. He frowned, but didn't say anything when James caught his eye and shook his head briefly but firmly.

"It's-

"Fucking."

"-Ridiculous is what it is!" Sirius protested. Peter raised a brow, impressed but also entirely unsurprised that James was so quickly picking up on when Sirius wanted to swear. "And we're missing the point here."

"What's the point, Pads?" Remus asked with a laugh, flopping back onto his bed casually, his voice muffled and distorted from the chocolate and probably incomprehensible to anyone who didn't know him as well as his fellow Marauders.

"That Wormtail over there has ruined my favourite shirt!"

"What?!" Peter asked, suddenly affronted. "How?"

James rolled his eyes and Sirius spluttered offendedly. "You left your disgusting smelly socks laying all over it!" Sirius exclaimed.

Peter blinked, sparing a thought for his poor eyelids which would be exhausted by the end of this ridiculous conversation. "What?" He asked incredulously.

"Your socks-" Sirius started with a disgusted voice.

"I heard you!" Peter interrupted. "I just- how the fuck did my smelly socks laying on your shirt ruin it?!"

Remus snickered from his bed, watching his three friends and munching on his chocolate like they were free entertainment (which he would tell you they were if you asked him).

"Because your-

"Fucking."

"-socks smell so bad that it's permeated my shirt!" Sirius shouted, shaking said garment at Peter. James was still filling in the swears Sirius would usually use, looking bored as he took a seat at the end of Peter's bed. Peter couldn't help being impressed that Sirius was actually doing so well at not using any of the swear words, "And it's-"