One Last Try [HP Jamione fanfic]

49. My Tears Ricochet

A/N: Look.. it had to happen okay

7th August 1978

James clutched tightly at Hermione's hand, his grip almost bruising. Tears had tracked lines on his brown skin and caught against the unshaven stubble on his chin. Hermione's eyes were red-rimmed and sore, and her throat was dry when she tried to swallow.

On the other side of James, Sirius stood. Stoic and calm to an outsider, but she could see the cracks in his well placed walls, the raw emotions trying to spill out around the edges. Lily's hand was grasped in Sirius', though at this point it was unclear whether it was for his benefit or hers. Her face was tear-streaked too, and her normally luscious hair was scraped back into a utilitarian and limp ponytail.

Remus, Peter, Dorcas, Alice, and Frank all stood back behind the four, but Hermione could feel the support they leant to the two grieving Marauders. Remus' hand twitched like he wanted to step forward and grip Sirius' shoulder in support, but didn't think he'd be welcome. She wasn't sure how long they'd been standing there in the graveyard, all wearing black robes and soaked to the skin in the cold August rain, but she would stay for as long as James needed her.

She turned her gaze from her mourning boyfriend to the grave before them. Freshly laid beside Dorea's, Charlus Potter's grave looked too new and out of place.

It had been unexpected, his death. He'd hidden the complications his bout of Dragon pox had caused him, so when it returned with a vengeance and ravaged his body, no one had been expecting it. James had been at the Prewett's for dinner when Sirius flooed in, devastation writ across his handsome features. They'd all been quiet and subdued while James and Sirius planned the funeral. James had barely spoken two words to Hermione the whole week, but she didn't blame him. She'd seen how badly Dorea's death after Christmas had affected him, and just wished that he'd gotten longer before facing another blow like this.

She silently cursed herself for not remembering how and when the Potters died from the research she'd done in 1997. For not doing something to try and prevent it. For not protecting the man she loved from the pain of being an orphan before he turned twenty.

James let out a choked sob beside her, the first noise he'd made in hours, if not days. She dropped his hand to turn to him and pull him into her arms. He held himself stiff for a moment before sinking into her, his hands lifting to clutch at the back of her robes tightly; as though if he let go she might leave him too.

She knew the feeling, so she stroked one hand down his back, letting the fingers of the other tangle gently in his messy shock of black hair, trying to straighten it into some kind of order. She made eye contact with Frank over James' shoulder as her best friend led Dorcas and Alice silently from the graveyard. He sent her a small, sad smile. Peter and Remus both stepped up, Peter helping Hermione to prop up James' dead weight as he sobbed uncontrollably into her.

Sirius was still and silent when she glanced over at him, but he seemed to have finally let himself feel something. His face was twisted into a look she could only describe as grief-tinged rage. Remus stepped up beside Sirius, between him and James, and rested a supporting hand on Sirius' shoulder. Hermione watched in sad silence as the final walls Sirius had painstakingly built up crumbled down.

Remus followed Sirius to the floor as he collapsed in a heap of ugly tears and snot, Lily took a silent step back for now and let Remus comfort the man they all knew he loved (except Sirius of course). Hermione wasn't entirely sure what was happening with Sirius and Lily's relationship, but knew they'd come to her for help if they needed it. Now wasn't the time to think about it.

James slowly pulled away from Hermione, tears still shimmered in his eyes and rolled down his cheeks. She and Peter stood back and watched as he pushed his way past Lily, barely noticing her, to get to Sirius. The two brothers clung to each other on the cold, damp ground and wailed for the parents forever lost to them.