Lifeguard

One call away

Sirius laid on the couch staring at the ceiling.

"What is it?' Mary asked. "Sirius was the life of the party yesterday."

"Leave off it, come on." James pulled Mary's sleeve.

"No, no, it's like a funeral in here." She scanned the faces of the three of them. "Did something happen?"

"Not really." Remus said. "Mary, it's not something we should share, it's Sirius' okay?"

Mary let herself be dragged outside the potter's house. "How come all of you know and I don't?"

"Sirius isn't one to share his past, Mary, you know that."

"Why do you all know then?"

"Well, us two are his best friends and a lot happened in high school." James pointed to himself and remus.

"So I'm always going to be left out of these things because I wasn't there?"

"Mary," Lily said. "I don't think Sirius keeps these things from you on purpose. Maybe once it passes you can ask about it."

"He doesn't owe me anything."

"Of course, but I also don't think he minds you knowing."

"Was high school really that good?"

"It was difficult sometimes." James said. "But it was amazing."

"Don't ask too much about high school," Remus warned. "You will regret it."

"Why?" Mary asked suspiciously

"Oh, if you ever want the high school experience just ask." James said

**

Regulus

I twisted around the water, trying to get the binds off me. I didn't know what they were. I hoped they weren't living. Maybe it would just break free and I could escape. I choked and my efforts were starting to get weaker as I got weaker. I felt faint and my chest burned.

I kept choking as I woke up. I gasped many deep breaths before calming down. Tears ran out of the sides of my eyes. I stared at my ceiling, watching the bit of light not covered by curtains move from cars passing by my window.

I sent out some sort of silent ironic thanks to a nonexistent god that it was early enough for my mother not to be awake.

I sat up in bed. Tomorrow is my birthday. I was distinctly punched with the feeling that I did not want to be alive then. Within the week I will be forced into a contract by my parents to work at their company, to work every second for the rest of my life. Every second that wasn't working on the job would be working on getting a wife and heirs and keeping up appearances. I felt like my life was a timer counting down the days until I would be trapped into that life.

I have to kill myself.

***

Sirius jumped down the stairs. "Time to do something!"

The friends who didn't live there were already there, it being late morning, and it being summer.

Even Mary didn't believe Sirius was fine. Despite her not knowing the circumstances, the dark circles under his eyes and the slight faulting in his confidence made it obvious that he was just on another phase of the spiral.

They all knew not to question it, though. Despite Sirius using their fun days of activities to distract himself, it also helped sometimes to be distracted.

James individually gave each of them a lecture about how they have to keep Sirius away from any alcohol. Which was obvious to anyone but Mary. It was fine to let him get sloshed if it was just a sad thing. But he would get angry, James knew, this time he would get angry. Mostly at himself.