|?{Mania}¿| Alastorxreader

Unquote Quotes

I felt like making unquote quotes as a joke to the book.
Enjoy!

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Y/n: "Wow, Lucifer really hates you, strawberry."

Alastor: "Yes, perhaps he's against us having a relationship."

Y/n: "....But we're not in a relationship, Alastor..."

Alastor: "WE'RE NOT!?"

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Angel: "Can I get a waffle?"

Y/n: *Casually losing their shit on Alastor because he helped them out in the kitchen*

Angel: "Ca-can I please get a waffle?"

Y/n: *Still throwing shit around in an endless rage*

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Vaggie: "You're stupid!"

Alastor: "Well you're dumb."

*Vaggie quietly mumbling under her breath, at a loss for words*

Y/n: *Pops in to defend Vaggie*
"I don't like your hair."
*points at Alastor*

Alastor: *Gasps with a hand over his heart, emotional wounded*

Angel: *Whispering* "Oh my god, they went there...."

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Y/n: "You have exactly 3 seconds to explain why you just woke me up." *Pointing an accusing finger at him*

Alastor: *With a cheesy ass grin* "Because it's morning, and you should be awake!"

Y/n: "Oh! Interesting. I didn't know you wanted to die today..."

Alastor: "Y/n...you can't kill me."

Y/n: "It's too late! I've already decided how."

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Y/n: "I really like Eminem."

Alastor: "I prefer skittles."

Y/n: "No, like, the rapper-"

Alastor: *Alarmed* "Dear, why would you eat the wrapper!?"

Angel Dust: *Laughing their ass off at his confusion and panikk*

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Angel: *Has gathered everyone to the lobby as he stands in a door way* "Put on a cute ass outfit, and walk infront of your camera at 0.3x speed, AND TELL ME, YOU DON'T FEEL LIKE A BAD BITCH."

Y/n: *Walks out with a sly smirk on their face as they twirl around in the new outfit that Angel had found for them*

Alastor: *Literally has a heart attack*

Y/n: "Oh damn...he ded ded....how sad...."

Also Y/n: "Anyways-!" 😃

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Y/n: "We have gathered here today, to mourn the loss of our dear deer, who passed, after being given the ass whooping of a death time."

Alastor: "Y/n....I'm not dead.."

Y/n: "Not yet you aren't." *smiles*
"But I have high hopes and i made bets, so dont let me down, dear."

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Angel: "If I punch myself and it hurts, am I strong or weak?"

Vaggie: "Strong. 🖕"

Alastor: *From around a corner* "Weak."

Y/n: "A dumbass."

Charlie: "Why the violence? 😭"

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Y/n: *in tears while eating their favorite comfort food* "I love myself. Even if I look like a BURNT CHICKEN NUGGET, I still love myself."

Y/n: "I'm also dating this stupid, fucking annoying, French fry." *jabs thumb in Alastor's direction, getting his attention*

Alastor: *walks over with a large supply of favorite comfort foods* "That, my dear, would make us a full happy meal! So never be without that beautiful smile of yours."
*hands tissues*

Y/n: "I–...touché."

Also Y/n: "BTW when did you learn what a Happy Meal is-?"

Edit: I made these like months ago, forgot about it, and just now found it again, so I'm posting it cause why tf not.

Have a good Thanksgiving Break yall.