His Salvation [Eddie Munson]

Chapter Fourteen

Eddie brings my hand up to his chest as we lay in bed. "I don't expect you to believe me when I tell you that it wasn't your fault. I know I'm not going to change your mind overnight, but I want to be here for you."

I want to run. I want to hide. But I feel so safe with him. I don't want to lose that. He's searching my face, waiting for my response. I can't form words and I just sit there for a moment in silence.

"I know you want me to be your girlfriend, but maybe we aren't compatible, Eddie," I say before I can even think it through.

His eyebrows furrow and he squeezes my hand. "Why would you say that?"

"I mean, look at us. We are both damaged." My eyes drop to my hand against his chest. I can't look him in the eyes.

"I think that's why we work, Madi." I can feel his heart beating against my palm.

"I don't know." I shake my head. I honestly don't know.

Will this really work? Or will it just end up causing me more pain if it doesn't work? My head hurts with everything that's happened and now these feelings are clouding my thoughts.

"We deserve to be given a chance. How about we give it until the end of the summer? If either of us feels like it's not working or we aren't compatible then we can end it. No pressure and no questions asked." He's watching me closely.

I'm not sure how I feel. I don't want to give up what we have, but I really don't know how we can be good for each other. We are both deeply damaged. How do two people make it work when they have things in their own life they haven't even made work?

"No pressure. Three months and then we can reassess the relationship." Eddie adds.

I can't tell how he really feels about this, but it is his idea. He is just trying to keep this thing going and giving me an easy out? Or does he want an opportunity to get out at the end? Maybe he wants to have his fun with me before he leaves this town. It makes sense. He's made it clear that he's leaving Hawkins and we haven't once talked about what that means for us. I mean, why would we? We haven't been involved in each other's lives for long enough to impact our future.

We both aren't ready for this to end, but we aren't sure how this could work. He's planning on moving and I don't have plans yet. The pressure of trying to make this last long term would be a lot.

Three months. It's just the summer and then I'll know if we can make it work. Or if he will still want me in his life. No pressure. No questions.

We stare at each other for a while. I guess there isn't anything to lose. We are basically test driving this relationship. It makes sense. I feel good about it. I think. A small piece of me is telling me that it's a bad idea, but I'm ignoring it.

"Okay," I answer.

He looks surprised. "Okay?" He questions.

"Yes, let's do it," I say confidently, but I don't know why I feel my stomach twisting.

He smiles and kisses me. "Okay, good. Now let's get some rest before our big day tomorrow."

I almost forgot that we are graduating tomorrow. My mind should be on that, but a stopwatch inside my head just started a countdown to the end of summer. Or maybe it's the end of this thing I have with Eddie. The numbers are descending and it haunts me as I close my eyes waiting for sleep.