THERE WAS NOTHING LEFT [A.L]

EPILOGUE

Dear Jules,

It's been a long time since I last wrote you a letter. I think it has been since Arthur found the letters I was sending to your apartment. A lot of things happened since then.

I got back in contact with Arthur, then with Enzo and then Pascale. Contacts with Charles are still complicated after something I'll write later.

I got to drive a real F3 car ! Jak Crawford couldn't drive for one weekend so Enzo - who became my manager by the way - negotiated with Prema for me to drive his car. AND THEY SAID YES ! Can you believe that !

The weekend was A-MA-ZING ! It was so fun to drive around the track and then when I got the hang of it during qualifying I did great ! I qualified P8 ! And guess who got points... ME !!! I was so exciting ! And I even got a fucking podium on Sunday !

A PODIUM JULES ! Can you believe that !!!

I finished P3 and Arthur won the race ! On the podium I could only think of you and I hoped you were proud of me. This podium was dedicated to you, I even said that in the radio when I got the news that I was on the podium.

Then I got to drive your 2014 Marussia around Suzuka ! It was amazing ! I decided to get a special helmet for the occasion. It was your 2014 design but with my colours. It looked incredible !

When I drove around Suzuka I cried. It was like completing what you never got to do and it was heartbreaking yet fulfilling.

I think this amplified the hate Charles has towards me. The rumours said it would be him driving your car yet it was announced it would be me. I hope that one day Charles and I'd relations will get better not only for you but also for Enzo, Arthur and Pascale.

Then later this year I got an amazing news : I have an F3 seat for next season ! How exciting ! Don't worry, I'm not taking anyone's spot, Arthur is FINALLY moving to F2 alongside Dennis Hauger.

Now I've been thinking of a helmet design and I have to say that the helmet design I had when I drove your car, in your honour, was beautiful. So I've been thinking of using your design as a base and modifying it to look more like me. I hope you don't mind !

I'm also joining an academy ! I got multiple offers, including the Ferrari Driver Academy but I decided to accept McLaren's offer. Their academy is basically empty while the FDA is completely full, the chances of me making it to F1 were way too low. The team is really supportive so it's nice and they are already talking about letting me do some test runs of their 2021 and 2022 cars !

Also, I found a bunch of sponsors. I don't know if they are here for the last name, for the fact that I am a girl or just because I'm talented but I got a bunch of offers as well ! I need to thank Enzo for all that, he's been an amazing manager, if not the best ! Now thanks to him I don't have to worry about paying for my season or anything else.

Anyways... talking about exciting news : I moved out ! Finally ! Since I'll have to be in Italy to train for F3 I rented a cute little house, very close to the other drivers. I'm actually about a 5 minutes walk from Arthur. I have to say that having him close to me is reassuring.

The house is very cute ! I love it ! It's a very decent size for one person to be honest, it has two bedrooms, a small garden, and even a jacuzzi ! Can you believe that, I have a jacuzzi !

Also, I hope you don't mind but I'm actually/finally using your apartment in Monaco... I mean it was an empty apartment in Monaco that was already fully paid and in your will you said it would be mine if you ever died... so I guess it's mine now ? I'm not sure... I don't know. For me it will always remain yours no matter what.

I don't think Charles is happy about me living there but he has nothing to say about it since it's legally mine. I didn't want to destroy or change anything there but at the same time I wanted it to be my own. Arthur and Enzo keep telling me that if I sold it, a new owner would have had no remorses making it its own.

I decided to put a lot of your trophies on display with your 2014 helmet design. Even if you cannot be there physically, I want you there spiritually.

Going on more like private life... Arthur and I are together now. I have to say that I wasn't expecting it but Enzo told me you always thought we would end up together. And once again you were right.

He is amazing Jules ! He is loving, caring, cuddly, funny, smart - actually, I take that back, he is not the smartest - and just the sweetest guy. Considering what Enzo told me, I'm fairly confident you'd be happy for me.

He's been helping me so much and even more since we've been together. He's been there for all the breakdowns I've had while redoing your/my place.

I almost forgot ! Daniel got in contact with me ! It's nice to have him back in my life as well. He came to talk to me before I drove your car to give me some advice and after to congratulate me. He said I drove amazingly and he was impressed by how simple I made it look ! He also helped me choose an academy, giving me some precious advice. When he saw some moving in your apartment he came to see what was going on. He was surprised to say the least but happy overall. He even helped me repaint the living room. Did it end up in a paint fight ? I'll let you guess that. But I have to say that paint is hard to get off hair.

He's been spending quite some time in the apartment with me. He misses you a lot as well. He's been telling me so many stories about you ! You used to be quite the duo from what I heard !

I also met his girlfriend, Heidi. Oh you would love her ! She is a sweetheart and those two are the cutest couple I've ever seen. I aspire to have such a healthy relationship with Arthur.

Now my objective is to have a better relationship with Charles. I hope it's possible because I miss him as a big brother figure. And I don't really want the Leclerc family dinners to be cold and all that. At least to be on speaking terms ? I think that's manageable... right ?

I know Arthur, Enzo and Pascale are trying their best to improve it from their side but I need to act as well, if I don't show that I want us to be on better terms, nothing will happen. That's why I think of organizing a dinner at the apartment for the entire family with Charles and Charlotte.

To conclude, it's weird to write about so many great things that happened while the last letter I wrote you was about me wanting to end it all and planning to join you no matter where you are.

I guess writing letters about what was happening to me to someone that was able to reply only did well for me.

I've said thank you to Arthur a million times already for that because he is the one that saved my life. I still believe you are the one that did it, that made Arthur go to your apartment that day and I'll always be thankful for that.

One day I'll get to you, but for now, I have a life here to live.

To my guardian angel.

Loulou

There was nothing left after he was gone - 

- because she had everything to rebuild on her own