Note: Yes LOL, she still writes a diary during the 15 years of her life. I can't write them all, that will be a lot. But here's the present diary.
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April 13
Dear Diary,
I would be lying if I say I never thought of Kaiden during the past 15 years of my life. I did. Every now and then, every time I'm not preoccupied with anything. Every time I feel alone and every time I sleep.
It still hurts, I still cry some times, but I managed to be strong because I need to. I was finally okay, but I will never get over the heartbreak I felt for him.
I thought what I dreamed of the last time about him is just temporary and it's part of those crazy dreams I have where I will forget and will go back to normal, but no. It was permanent. Kaiden did go away. I never dreamed of him again since he died in my dream. I never saw any glimpse of him in my dreams.
Looking back at it now, I kinda cringe on what I did back then. I went really extreme on my mom and Layla. But I can't blame myself. I was in love...
No matter how real, how true, or false those dreams are and Kaiden himself, I cannot blame myself for falling in love because love is that complex.
We will love someone that is beyond our expectations. I always thought I will fall for someone who's a nice, almost perfect man, but even that is too hard to believe. Kaiden was never real but he's never perfect. In a small amount of time we spent together, I saw his imperfections and I still loved him.
But... Come to think of it, for the past 15 years, I never wrote about him in my diary not until today. I avoided thoughts of him and writing about him too much because it'll make me sad, but I never failed to mention him in some diary entries.
Why today?
It's because this day marks the day, 15 years ago when I first dreamed of Kaiden.
I had to look for my diary where I first wrote about the first dream I had with him. It's funny and it's sad at the same time. But enough talk about him... Maybe some other time again.
Still dreaming,
Kei
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I Had a Dream Last Night
General FictionI Had a Dream Last Night is officially self-published! For orders, please message me personally on my Facebook profile. - NOT ONLY IS HE THE MAN OF MY DREAMS, BUT ALSO THE MAN FROM MY DREAMS. Kei, a high school senior, fell inlove with Kaiden in her...
