The Turtle Charm

Shopping

"Come to think of it, it makes sense," I said, "If there's anything our worlds have in common, it's that New York City is a big place with lots going on, cosplayers exist, and Hawaiian pizza's the best." While Donnie gave me a dubious look I continued, "But why do we need to look like alien turtles when we could pass without the gear?"

"Makes it look a little more realistic," said Donnie, "Like we're trying to hide the obvious fakeness."

"Ah. I see."

"Alright everyone, we'll hit up a couple of thrift and used stores, get Casey and Tina a couple of sets of clothes, and be back to the lair in no time," said Raph, "Mission complete."

"Mission?" said Leo, "We're just on a shopping spree today."

"Are you sure this isn't just fine?" asked Casey indicating his clothes.

"Dude, that outfit is so tomorrow," said Mikey, "And the stench isn't pretty."

"It's just so unreal," said Casey, "Last time I got new clothes, my mom was still around."

"Oh, what was she like?" asked Mikey.

"She was the strongest woman I knew. She was Commander O'Neil's right-hand woman and trusted friend. Together they could do anything. When I was a kid, they even risked their lives to..." Casey sighed, "She was...amazing."

Years of consuming character-driven stories honed my abilities to read between the lines. And it seemed everyone else got the memo, well almost everyone.

"So...where do we start?" said Leo.

At a thrift store, we huddled around to go over the plan. "It'll be more efficient if we break into teams of three. Someone will need to go with Casey and someone else with Tina. The rest of us will get hit up the bed ware and kitchenware," said Raph, "You know, get the odds and ends."

"Come on," said Leo, "They're big kids. We don't need us to hold their hands."

Donnie gasped, seeming to notice something in the distance, and quickly turned Casey around saying, "Well, I vote teams. I'll take Casey. Bye!"

"I'll be fine on my own," I said shruging, "It's not like I've never wandered a store by myself. What could happen?" So I headed for the women's section.

Having found a couple of cute things I liked, I took them to a nearby mirror checking how they looked against me. I sighed. It was too small. If I didn't have this spikey shell tit probably would fit...Even if I went with something bigger, I was afraid it would probably tear it up.

I noticed Leo in the background of the mirror looking at me strangely. "Umm...hey. Weren't you the guy who said Casey and I were big kids, so we didn't need hand holding?" I asked.

"Oh...right. I came here because I need something from this aisle too..."

"The women's aisle?"

"Yep..."

"Alright, I get it. Some guys are into Drag. Heck, I'm into a bit of drag myself. I pull off a great Breath of the Wild Link, especially when he dresses in the Vai set," an awkward pause passed, "I guess you guys don't have Zelda in this universe..." Then another thought popped into my head, "Unless you have a girlfriend?"

"Girlfriend?" The turtle jolted at that, "No. No, I am a single turtle." A tint of pink flushed the turtle's cheeks a little. To me, this meant that the other half of my favorite ship also existed in this universe, Kari. It was obious the leader of TMNT 2012 and her character were into eachother. Even the 2003 series gave off a shipping vibe. It was like a star-crossed lovers' situation and even in this world where the team leader was impulsive and arrogant, I wanted to see my ship set sail.

"Okay, maybe you don't have a girlfriend," I said teasingly, "But there's somebody you defiantly like." Thinking mostly about 2012 Kari, I turned the turtle's attention to some black and spikey clothes. "I'm guessing she'll like those pieces over there."

"Really? Is it something...up your ally?"

"Not on the average New Mexican day. Honestly, I prefer denim and tyedye, but you seem like the kind of guy into cool, spiky chicks. I mean, they are kind of hot. And I know cool, spikey chicks, my ex was one." At that moment I saw April passing by with another, a mildly intense-looking girl wearing dark shades and spikes. I declined to bring it up or even call their attention. When you shop for someone, it's great to leave things a surprise. "Oh, yeah, they're real hot," I said looking the girl up and down. 

"So you like women?" For a second, I could have sworn the turtle looked a little disapointed.

"Yeah, guys too. I'm bi."

He now seemed to perk up a bit as he said, "Really? Me too!"

"Oh, ever dated a guy?" I saw the possibility for another ship I liked, "Maybe a handsome ronin?"

Leo chuckled, "I guess you could see me with one, like cool, spikey chicks?" he sighed, scratching his head, "Nope. As it turns out, not even my Battle Nexus Champion status can get me a date...You?"

"Oh, I've been on lots of dates. But I've only been an item with the one ex and that was years ago. I think it was my curves that attracted most, I mean I know I'm good looking...Or at least I was," I sighed

Turning back to the mirror, I noted that my form seemed to be an amalgamation of the turtles. I seemed to have Raph's shell and Donnie's frame. Each of my limbs had similar splotch marks to those on Mikey's, while Leo's curving eye marks ran to my cheeks. Being in the form of an amphibian now, I didn't have the same curves as I did before. My green eyes and wavey brown hair were about the only recognizable things about me now.

"You know, you were pretty good-looking as a human," said the turtle. It felt like a boulder was dropped on me. Like, did this guy have no emotional intelligence? "But you know..."

At that moment, people started screaming and fleeing. Crashing through the aisles was Raph wrestling a polar bear man who yelled out"Tortugas!"