Stall me

Chapter 18.

Brendons pov

What the fuck have I done?

Laying here in the hotel bed, it was now close to 4am, I haven't slept a wink. I shouldn't have done this.

Why did I do this?

I can't do it again. I can't fall for another person again. I'm a sex and leave person. Not someone who just lays with the person after, being so intimate, talking and laughing together.

I can't do this again. It was a mistake.

Emerson isn't the type of girl to just fuck and leave, she's fragile.

Damaged goods.

And now I've gone and fucked that up. Once again.

I rub my tired eyes and get up, I can't face her, not right now, I don't know what I would say or do, she doesn't deserve what I'm going to do to her.

But it has to be done.

I throw my clothes into my bag, not caring about them being wrinkly later, jimmy's like a mom he can take care of it.

We were about to be on a plane for 17 hours. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know how I'm going to go about it, but all I know is,

I need to quit being around Emerson.

I walk out of the room, storming down the hallway and dodging everyone's rooms, I needed to be alone right now. I was just going to get on the plane and go to my room.

All I could think about was Sarah.

When I was with Emerson, Sarah was the one in my head, I think that's why I enjoyed it so much, I think that's why I kissed her yesterday, why I did everything I did. I thought it was Sarah.

But she is not Sarah.

I see our driver parked out front, ready to go a little early, I open the door and climb in, throwing my bag into the backseat.

"Little early for you to be in here." He sighs.

"Just take me to the jet, come back and get the others."

He nods, starting the car and driving out of the hotel parking lot. I lay my head back against the seat, my eyes heavy with lack of sleep, all I could imagine was my time with Emerson. She was the best I've had in a long time, and I feel so comfortable around her.

I also feel vulnerable, and that's not okay.

I am not the type of person to just sit and talk about feelings. I don't do relationship shit, not since my wife.

I wish the whole thing never even happened.

Emerson's POV.

Sitting on the plane, I can't help but wonder why he hasn't said anything to me.

When we all met out in the lobby, Jimmy told us Brendon was already on the plane, and now, five hours after we left Manchester, he is still in his room.

We still had another 12 hours left to go, and I was completely bored out of my mind. My mind wouldn't stop racing with thoughts, not knowing what was going on with him, maybe he was just sleeping, maybe he was ignoring me, but whatever the reason, I felt it best to leave him be.

He wasn't my boyfriend.

"Em, will you take a picture of me?" Ashton asks.

"Umm, I mean yeah, with my camera?" I question.

Ashton shakes his head, handing me his phone, I grab it and go to the camera, being a photographer and all, I gotta get the best angles.

I sit up on the chair I was sitting in, bending my legs and twisting my arms, trying to get the perfect angle.