Oneshots 'n Shortstories

I can't take this ✨

Some sort of vent ig.

View Noira

I had just locked the bathroom door to our dorm room behind me and slid down the door.

Tears ran uncontrollably down my cheeks. I heard the dorm door being opened and Bellatrix yelling at me. I didn't listen to her words. On her words that had hurt me. Who insulted me and brought me down.
More times than ever before. Maybe it was because she had argued the same way my father had and called me a sin. Or that the others also took Bella's side when she complained about my sexuality and how abnormal it is to be attracted to all genders.

Not even Felixa hugged me when the first tears came. She just stood aside and looked at me pityingly as a few others had also gathered around me and seemed to be holding me captive in their midst. At one point I almost collapsed and just ran out of the circle and into the bathroom. I can't do this anymore. I do not want to any more. I just feel useless.

"Hey! Noira come out. come out to me Just be straight." I cried out in agony. "Get it Black! Sexuality isn't a choice. If it were, I'd be normal too. You have no idea how much I hate myself. Just shut up. I have enough problems." I croak through the door and bang my head back against the door. Exhausted, I fell onto my side. Bellatrix started screaming something again.

I covered my ears and just screamed. "Just leave me alone!" I cried out. The feeling of uselessness spread through my body and burned in my eyes. "Lestrange come out! That doesn't work. Come here, I want to tell you something!" I kicked the door with my foot. "Shut up!" I cried out loud. I curled up exhausted and cried to myself. Suddenly I heard someone slide down the door.

I sniffed and waited for Bella's insults but only a soft voicerang out. It was Jo-Ann. The older Slytherin who had helped us in first year. I heard the door open.
"Noira? There are only the two of us now. Black is gone. can you tell me what happened I want to be there for you like you were for me when I was down, like you were there for everyone when they needed it." I wiped away a tear. "I'm useless. I'm a burden to everyone and a freak that Pan is. ABNORMAL. You know? I'm going to hell for this! My friends feel the same way I-" Her soft voice let out a soothing sound.

,,Noira. You're a... a damn wonderful girl. And being pansexual is not a sin. And you are not useless. Just look. You are there for everyone who needs you. For everyone who loves you, for everyone you love. Without you, I would be a walking wreck. Damned. We need you. I need you. If you don't do it for the others... do it for me. Come out for me, I want to take you in my arms and not let go. I want to take your emotional pain away. Wants to make you feel good." She grew quieter and quieter.

I tried to pull myself up rather awkwardly. I unlocked the door and stumbled into Jo's arms. She hugged me tightly and I hugged her too. Her warmth helped calm me down. Her words. Just everything. She picked me up somewhat awkwardly and set me down on my bed. She sat down next to me and sat me on her lap. My arms wrapped around her shoulders for protection and hers pulled me closer to her at the waist. I was still shaking, but my tears had stopped and she gently stroked my back. I sniffed again and rested my chin on her shoulder.

"Thanks Jo." I whispered. I saw her start to smile happily. "Are you okay my pansexual shadow frog?" I nodded, laughing softly. "Thank you sis." I whispered. She said I could call her that to describe the emotional bond between us. Because she was like a big sister to me.

She had helped me out of my holes so many times Of course I always tried to give it back to her, I was glad to have her. "Whatcha doing cuddling in gay?" It came from the door. Jo looked at Bellatrix.

"Cuddling in supportive, caring and sisterly." She kissed the top of my head and relaxed my grip. I broke up with her too. I wiped away the last tears and looked at Bellatrix.
,,Say it. Say you're worth something." Jo said after grabbing my hand and looking into my eyes. "I- I'm... I'm worth it! And I am me! Ac-Accept me as I am or let me perish alone. Without you." Bellatrix was a little surprised, then she took a step towards me.

I wanted to step back, but Jo pushed me back. Suddenly, Bellatrix's arms closed around me. "This is my Lestrange." I was shocked at first, then hugged back and choked back tears of joy.

"Of course you're worth something. I didn't know...I didn't know it would bring you down like that." I suddenly let my tears flow freely. "You know I have a shitty sense of humor... sorry. ' she whispered, pushing me away to look into my eyes.

,,Do you hear? My apologies to you, From me- Black." She wiped a tear from my cheek with her thumb. I nodded, cracking a grin. "I appreciate that."

~967 words This chapter deals with my self-doubt. Jo-Ann represents all of my supportive friends. Those are all words they used. (Except for the normal due to sexuality, because I have no problem with that in private life)