ALL THE WORDS WE COULDN'T SAY

O N E

As I brought my face down to the cold surface of the bathroom sink, I pressed a finger to the left side of my nose and inhaled with my right nostril. The cocaine hit me like a bullet as I straighten up. I felt my nerves stimulate and my blood rushed with excitement.

"Not bad for your first time." Nathan patted me on the back with a loose laugh.

"You know damn well this isn't my first time."

"No, but it is your first in a stranger's bathroom that looks like it needs a tetanus shot."

I looked around the slimy, grime-filled bathroom. He was right. It did need a tetanus shot. In my sober state, I would've squirmed at the yellowing tiles and mould-coated walls, but high and drunk on an empty stomach, it might as well have been the Queen's bathroom for all I cared.

I started to laugh at Nathan. Usually, his dull humour wasn't much to laugh at, but everything is funnier when you're under the influence.

Amidst our fits of laughing at nothing, the bathroom door began to shake violently as someone's fist rapidly slammed against it.

"Open the door, dickheads!" A muffled, female voice erupted from the other side.

"Yeah? Or what?" It was a childish response from Nathan but I found it hilarious.

"Or I'll fucking kill you, how about that?"

"Why do you want us to open the door?" Nathan asked and I stifled a laugh.

"To take a piss, you stupid fuck!"

"What if we don't want to leave?" I chimed in. It was faint against the blare of heavy music but I swore I heard a frustrated sigh.

"I never said leave, did I?"

Nathan and I exchanged a mischievous glance before he excitedly opened the door, daring this girl to commit to her challenge.

It was as if all the toxins in my blood had evaporated when that door opened. I felt the comforting fog in my brain dissolve away, as if nothing else ever felt more clear as day to me.

It was Persy. The Persy. The Persy who I knew since I was fifteen. The Persy, who was the only friend I'd known before University. The only friendship I ever cared about and then ruined because of my own prejudice.

That Persy stood in front of me. I hadn't seen her for five whole years. Rich, black hair straight as a pin that stopped past her shoulders. Hazel, fox eyes framed in a frown, which appeared a lot darker from the dim lights. Pale, olive skin dressed in a satin dress and sheer, black stockings.

"Move." She growled, brushing past me. Not bothering to spare either of us a glance. Without hesitating, she bowed toward us and pulled down her underwear before sitting on the toilet seat. I caught the barest glimpse of red lace before Nathan and I simultaneously turned around. I couldn't even hear the surprised laughter come out of Nathan's mouth, or the sound of her pissing four feet away from me, with the brutal thudding of my pulse in my ears.

She didn't recognise me. For some reason I was glad. I treated her like shit when she was the one person who truly cared for me. She offered me kindness and I let my bitter judgement get in the way.

I felt beads of sweat beginning to form on my forehead. Nobody here, not even Nathan knew what sort of person I used to be. I made sure of that. I needed a new life, a new start. One far from my old school. I regretted much of what I'd done, even though I was just a kid. Of all people, Persy didn't deserve it. Now that I'd seen her here, I became vulnerable. But I had to know more.

"Fucking wankers." Persy pushed past us after flushing the toilet and washing her hands.

Nathan let out another amusing laugh.