Gift of a Lifetime

V

It is September now, but in August things happened that I'd never guess.

Lindsey. A successful author. Turning 23 years old on the 19th. New Orleans, Louisiana. A house near the ocean. She was living her best life.

Being a ghost didn't always make sense. I could go wherever I wanted within seconds, I could go to sleep and wake up and it's a week later, sometimes I could see my own hands, sometimes I couldn't. But I was officially free. I still missed Jayden so much, and I couldn't find him for the longest time.

I followed Lindsey around for a few hours after I'd found her. I was watching over her shoulder what she was writing on a piece of paper (though I couldn't read as a ghost, I'd learned. I couldn't recognize letters or numbers), when I heard a familiar voice behind me that made my ghost heart stop.

"Hey, Lindsey."

I turned sharply. He looked right through me.

"Jayden," She addressed.

Jayden strolled over to look at what she was writing, right next to me. I couldn't take my eyes off of him. What was he doing here, in Lindsey's house?

My heart dropped. Scars and scratches laid on his face and neck. A bandage was stuck on his cheek. What happened?

"Same story from the other day? I thought you gave up."

She hesitated. "I changed my mind. I realized last night that it had potential."

Jayden hummed in response, turning and walking off.

I followed him down the hall, and into a room that seemed like it would be his. A grey and black bed set that went in the far corner of it, a carpet in the middle and a brown dresser on the opposite side of the room from the bed.

There was one wrinkled piece of paper on the nightstand beside the bed, folded into thirds, that he walked up to and picked up. He blankly stared at it as he unfolded it to reveal my poem. Had he been as miserable as this the whole time we were apart? And what was he doing in Lindsey's house!? He turned and walked out. Suddenly we were out on the beach, and I was following right behind him.

The sun was just below the horizon, twilight filling the sky in a dark indigo, the stars already beginning to sparkle far away. I was walking next to him, while he was completely unaware of me being there, which was an almost intolerable feeling. But when he looked down to where my feet would be he froze. Very, very faint footprints lined the sand behind me-- seeming to be just a subtle discoloration of the sand.

He looked at my transparent image. A shiver ran through him, ending in a shuttered breath. He couldn't move. Neither could I.

He knew he couldn't touch me. Everyone knew you could touch a ghost. But still, he lifted his hand and reached for my arm, resulting in a little explosion of particles the color of my skin. I twitched as memories passed through my mind; memories that were not mine.

A man held a faded picture of a him and another woman. In the background was a beautiful sunset, and smiles of genuine happiness painted an invisible glow. They looked happy. Tears collected in his eyes, but he blinked them away. It hit me that it was Jayden's father.

He turned around to see Jayden, concerned. His father's eyes grew angry and he threw something at him. I guessed it to be a glass bottle, considering the glass that shattered on the dining room table as Jayden dashed to the side, eyes wide. His father threw his arm up again and threw something else. This time it was bigger.

It Jayden square in the face, leaving scratches that gushed blood. A shiver ran down my spine as I saw a large shard had dug itself into his cheekbone. Jayden cried out as it him, leaning against the door frame as his dad, whom I no longer recognized, screamed in his face. I couldn't hear what he was saying, but I knew it was bad.

A bright light gleamed. A time skip. Lindsey was signing papers that I, again, couldn't read. Jayden looked through a window, gazing at her. Hope was written all over his battered face. A bandage was now replacing the shard, just like the one he had now, and the scratches on his face were nearly gone. She adopted him.

A tear of what I couldn't decide was happiness that he was able to see me again or sadness that I was gone raced down Jayden's cheek, flying away in the wind. The waves crashed in the distance, an illusion to my ears. My senses were failing. Time was running out.

I looked into the abyss of his eyes, searching for something I didn't know of. Maybe he would say something (even though I probably wouldn't understand him). A familiar expression formed on his face.

He smiled.

It was like he'd forgotten that I wasn't really here. I didn't like to think that. Maybe I shouldn't.

I should use the time that I have, even if my vision was beginning to blur and I was overwhelmed by the slightest feeling of the wind, to savor this last moment that we may be in one another's presence. One last time. Even if I'm not really there.

When I was born into this life, I was thrown into the pool of other people's opinions. I was born with an over-sized life jacket, and slowly it slipped off of my arms and tightened around my neck. By then it didn't matter, because I already had a hole in the side. The waves grew larger when I told Ryan about what happened to me.

I succumbed under the current, where I found Jayden. He was down there long before me. He didn't try to save me, but he made me feel more content underneath. I wasn't alone anymore. He taught me how to breathe, even though he didn't know how to himself. I swam to the deepest part of the pool where I thought I could save someone, but there I couldn't breathe.

Here we are now, saying our silent goodbyes. It was almost as if, even for just a moment, that we were back on the top of my roof, watching the sky darken before us. It was like, just for a moment, we were together again.