Gift of a Lifetime

IV

I was about to pass out when Jayden stormed through my bedroom door. A bloody knife was held in my left hand, and a stab wound going right into my abdomen. I lay in a T-pose on my back, the pain already starting to numb. I could taste the blood rising up from my throat.

"Tommy!" He hollered, running and kneeling over me. He had tears in his eyes already.

Guilt stabbed me in the back a million times over.

"I'm so sorry," I groaned, gurgling blood out of my mouth.

His face was painted with horror. "Why did you do this?" His hands were on me, though I couldn't identify where until I felt his thumb comfortingly brushing across my cheek.

"I'm gonna go," I said, my voice breaking and my body convulsing as I realized what I'd done, "And I'm gonna make that man give him his life back."

"Why?" He whispered, "Why can't you just stay?"

I blinked longingly at him, a tear dashing down my face. "None of this was supposed to happen, Jayden."

He stared at me in disbelief. I shivered, but I wasn't cold. "I'm not supposed to be here."

I coughed, sending a sharp pain in my abdomen and spitting blood everywhere. My eyes rolled back and I could feel my conscious slipping until Jayden held my head to his chest. I could hear his faint heartbeat, fast and anxious.

We sat there for those next few moments; silent except for my sharp, uneven gasps.

Suddenly our eyes locked and I could breathe again. That was when he closed his eyes and dipped his head, covering his face with a fist. I could hear sad hiccups in his breathing.

What have I done?

I gasped. "I'm so sorry."

He lifted his face and I saw a tear fall down his face. Would he forgive me?

I coughed out again, beginning to choke on the blood in my throat. In response, he sat me up in front of him, a hand on my back to support me. I began to feel drowsy. My head dangled side to side.

I looked at him.

When he suddenly leaned forward I felt the familiar feeling of his lips on mine. Our kiss was slippery with blood, yet still comforting. So many things were said within just a few seconds.

It was almost like that one night; just us alone on my back porch, faces pressed together, arms around each other, the warmth of his body against mine. But it was all in our heads as an experiment, just to see what it felt like, but I knew that deep down I was expressing my feelings in a way, though I'm still not sure if he knew that.

That was when it hit me that I never should've done that. I should've just waited for him like the lovesick person I was so when he got there we could kiss and sleep and hug and swim and wait out the rumors and live like normal teenagers; I could've gotten better. That kid's life was gone just like mine. It was never his life that was given to me. In that moment, with my eyes closed shut, I felt the familiar gust of invisible wind that swept me away from him, and knew I was gone.

I could see him, mouth now stained with blood, as he pulled away from me to see my eyes open in a blank stare, hollowed and dead.

"No," He cried, pulling me into a hug again. His wails came out loudly and painfully. I had never seen him cry that hard before. He loved me. Most likely to be the only person he did love. And I was gone.

I couldn't help but think to myself of how bad I was for doing that. After all he did for me, I just threw it all away.