Kaimelia One Shots (Kai x Amelia) (Grey's Anatomy Fanfiction)

Some Griefs are Heavier than Other Griefs

Some Griefs are Heavier than Other Griefs

Kai's POV

   Amelia and I are currently on the beach, having a similar conversation that Meredith and her best friend George O'Malley supposedly had on a beach (I'm still pretty convinced that this was all in Meredith's head when she was in a coma during her COVID stint) about grief. I'm learning more about all of the loss that Amelia has experienced in life, especially in recent years and my heart just drops to my stomach. The amount of loss I've experienced is insignificant compared to hears. God, I wish I could take her pain away. This poor woman deserves the world and has been shit on time and time again...

      Amelia sighs and a tear slips down her cheek. "I-I just wish I could release some of my grief, to not have to carry so much of it. If only some mystical being in the universe could shake some of it out of me, that would be terrific." I wipe away the tear that slips down her cheek and give her a gentle peck on the lips. "Amelia, I'm so sorry that you've experienced this extensive amount of grief. I don't wish that amount of grief on anyone, not even my worst enemy. You're such a beautiful person, inside and out. Even though I'm still getting to know you, I do know that I don't want to lose you. I wouldn't survive in a world without your vibrant spirit and strength despite the crappy cards you've been dealt." 

       "I miss so many people, but the person that I've lost that I miss the most is my brother Derek. Derek was my best friend, the one constant in my life, with the exception of Scout. He was the only sibling of mine that didn't make me feel ashamed of myself despite some of my poor life decisions, including my drug addiction that turned me into a monster for quite some time... not to mention the miscarriage that really screwed up my mental health, it went completely down the tubes at that time..." Amelia takes a shaky breath as I run my fingers through her incredibly soft hair. "I wish Derek was still alive, he had so many good years left to live. He's not going to get to see his three amazing children grow up nor is he going to get to grow old with the love of his life. Him and Meredith were truly meant for one another. Many at Grey Sloan would go as far as saying that they had the greatest love story of all time, within the hospital walls of course. I couldn't agree more with those people." 

     I look at Amelia with nothing but warmth in my eyes. "I can't compare us to Meredith and Derek, but I sure hope that we get to make an epic love story of our own. I really care about you Amelia and I look forward to seeing how our relationship blossoms over time." She leans her head on me. "I care about you a lot too Kai. You've made me the happiest I've been in a long time despite my manic moments or waves of grief. I feel like you understand me better than anyone else, well besides Meredith. Meredith is my twisted sister and twisted sisters know each other through and through." I laugh softly. "I suppose that's fair. I've never had any siblings, I've always been an only child. I sadly have a distant relationship with my parents. They don't accept my sexuality nor my identify of not having a gender. They constantly tell me that I have to pick one of the other, to be male or female. It's a sin in their eyes to not have a gender, even more so than changing your gender with reproductive surgery. Isn't that ironic?" 

      Amelia looks at me sadly. "That's a different type of grief, but it's a completely valid type of grief. I can only imagine that type of grief hurts just as much as the grief of losing several loved ones to death. I'm so sorry Kai, I truly am. You deserve to be accepted and loved for who you are, especially by the two people you expected to always support you in every step of the journey that is your life." She whispers something and I have to lean in closer to attempt to hear what she's saying. "What was that Amelia? I couldn't hear what you said." Amelia's hands begin to shake and I hold them in mine so that she gets the courage to tell me what's on her mind. "I-I love you Kai." I gasp and my eyes soften instantly. "I-I love you too Amelia. It feels like a dream to hear those words said aloud. It's been so damn long." 

       The two of us sit hand in hand on the beach in a blissful silence, watching the sunset on the ocean's horizon. I feel so blessed to be dating a human being that is genuine and seems to accept to every part of me so far. I hope that things with Amelia and I continue to go as well as they have been. I'm honestly quite smitten with her and to know that she reciprocates my feelings, puts me on cloud nine. I'm so high in the clouds that I don't want to come back down to Earth. Besides, Earth is a bit overrated these days. You know?