i've lost my heart to you..

Chapter:5

"this love is tainted i need you and i hate it."

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It's been two months of their marriage and nothing was fine from both sides. Zayn started spending most of his time outside the house, and his family noticed it he would leave for his office at early morning and won't come back till midnight. Zayn would sleep on couch and harry on the floor and their bed would remain empty. Zayn started ignoring him, they won't talk there was an uncomfortable silence which none of them wanted to break. Like a week ago Zayn came back around 2a.m and Trisha was waiting for him, he was drunk stumbling on his every step. He didn't noticed his mum and neither did she called him. But it was just the start after that it became a routine, he won't come back until 2a.m or sometimes 3 and always drunk.

" Zayn are you out of your mind?"

"nohh i'm not.''

"harry is worried sick about you and here you're drunk wandering with strangers."

His father yelled and pulled him towards his car, but Zayn was not ready to move,  he detached himself from his grip and walked towards the bar again, but his friends were also there they caught him by his back and put him in the car, his father thanked them. He started driving while Zayn was muttering something under his breathe holding beer bottle tightly in his hand.

" your mum is crying and harry is sick do you even know that he has fever from two days? what are you doing with your life, you're married you've your own family now and harry is your responsibility Zayn."

"buttt  harryy don'tt think i'm his husband dadd, he lovee someone else. My touch burns his skinnn what's hiss name el_ elijahhhh he loves himm not me, zaynn Malikkk is nothing for him."
He slurred and gulped the whole alcohol from that half empty bottle and when Yasir tried to stop him he chucked the bottle in car scaring his father. He stopped the car and Zayn fell in his arms, his eyes pricking with unshed tears. It was so hard for him to believe what Zayn was saying cause he didn't noticed any of this neither trisha, they both were happy at least that how it seems in their eyes.

Zayn started crying in his father's arms whispering everything that he was hiding from everyone, but now it's too much for his heart. He needed to tell this to someone otherwise he would die holding all these deep feelings in his heart, specially when all of his mates think he's happily married to one of the most beautiful person. only if they knew that how this marriage was hurting both of them.

" harryy is soo beatifulll dad, butt he's already inn loveeh with someone else. i don'ttt  know from wheree i cameee in hiss life, i'm_ i'm noo where near him you knoww we don't share anythingg except thatt room,  i'm nothing too himm, he's justt caged with mee in thiss relatonshipp."

"zayn__"

"pleasee listen dad i can'tt tell anyonee, no one wouldd understand and evryonee will blamee him and i can'tt stand thatt causee i lovee him sooo muchhh dad, muchh more than i ever thoughtt."

"sushh go it won't be nice if someone sees us like this please."

Harry pleaded looking behind him to make sure no one was watching them. There's always this fear in forbidden love, but the moment he was having with his love was worth it. Everything was worth it if he got to spent these sweet moments. Elijah shook his head and pulls his face close to his own and kissed his lips, harry glared at him with a smile on his lips. Yesterday he had his first kiss and after that Elijah couldn't stop kissing him he would follow him everywhere and wink at him and it was enough to make harry blush. Secret hand holdings, shy glances and those footies under dining table was all they do these days. Harry's cheeks were always adorn with a rosy  shade of blush, he would smile to himself  remembering elijah's face at night. Sleep deprived eyes and thirsty throat that half beating heart are chanting only one name Elijah.

" i want to marry you just now".

Elijah muttered nibbling his lips on his baby like soft skin, harry blushed and wrapped his arms around elijah's neck repeating dozens of i love yous he couldn't stop himself from saying these three words again and again. Elijah picked him in his arms in bridal style kissing his forehead on their way, he made him sit on the garden swing securing harry's body in his warmth. They spent rest of the night together under moonlight, Elijah was so gone for this beauty in his arms that he was thanking his fate that he got harry in his life. His life without harry seems colourless now.

"you okay? dad told me you were sick."

Zayn asked when harry came from washroom. Harry nodded his head and started doing his hair. Zayn wanted to ask more, last night he messed up everything, now his family knows about their relationship and his mum told him to make everything good between both of them. When harry was on the door Zayn held his wrist, harry didn't turn back but zayn's  touch was pleading him to stop so he did stop. When he closed the door behind him, Zayn let go of his wrist.

" harry um i know you don't want this marriage and me, infact you hate me and it's fine i should have asked your consent before marrying you. But you don't have to worry about anything i've talked to my lawyer and he said we can apply for divorce after four months, after that i swear i'll help you to find Elijah and would make sure that you're with him, but until then please can we pretend that everything is fine between us and we're happy."

"promise me "

Harry whispered at last while staring in his brown orbs with his glossy eyes, his eyes were red and he was looking more pale. Zayn wanted to engulf him in his arms and never let him go, but harry is not his so he nodded his head.

" i promise i'll help you to find him, doesn't matter where he is."

even though it will rip my heart, but i would do anything for you

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