EMMÉ
"Thank you for doing this."
I step inside the house nervously then I rest my eyes on her. She looks very calm as she nods.
"Come in." she says leading the way.
After my talk with Gundo I went home and cried. I kept replaying his words in my mind and they hurt so much because nothing he said was a lie, it was all true. When I left, I wasn't thinking about Dakalo. I took a decision and didn't consider how it would affect him, I was only thinking about myself and what I was feeling.
A couple of days later I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself. I know I'm in the wrong and I know he doesn't want me anywhere near Dakalo, but he's my son too and I want to talk to him... So I went and did the one thing he told me not to do, I called Thandi.
I'm desperate and right now she's the only person who can throw me a lifeline. I don't deserve it, but I figured it was worth a try and it proved to be worth it because she agreed to help me. She didn't pass me any judgement. She simply said she would let me know when it will be okay for me to come over and now I'm here.
"I know I'm putting you in a difficult position, I know Gundo doesn't want us talking but thank you Thandi, thank you for helping me, I really do appreciate it."
We both take seats in the living room and I clutch my handbag against my stomack for support.
" I believe that this is necessary. Gundo is clouded by anger, which is understandable... But I believe that if Dakalo doesn't have this conversation with you then things will only get worse." She says softly
"I'm not trying to turn his life upside down, I just need a chance to talk to him and explain."
"I know that, Despite everything that's happened, you're still his mother. That fact can never be changed."
"You raised him and you evidently did it so well."
"I tried my best." she says.
"What did you first think when I left?"
"I thought you were going through postnatal depression, I figured that a few months down the line you'd come back for him... But months turned into years and the more time that passed, the less I thought about it all. I just stopped thinking about it."
"You never judged me." I say feeling a bit surprised, I would have expected that my sister wife at the time would be the first to cast the stone... I know it's not in Thandi's nature but I had given her enough ammunition.
"It wasn't my place to judge you, I don't know what you were feeling and I know that we went through some hard times."
"You're too kind, Thandi. Dakalo is lucky to have been raised by you... If I had stayed... I'm not sure he would be the person that he is today. Between me trying to please my dad and my dad not knowing where to draw the line plus aunt Julie's influence... I don't see how Dakalo would have grown to be such an exceptional young man. "
" We all did what we could... Now it's your turn to tell him your story. "
" I will try to not be long, incase Gundo comes back. "
" You have all the time you need, he won't be home any time soon. " she says and I nod.
She makes coffee for the both of us and we both sit there waiting for Dakalo. It's not until later when we hear his voice echo around the house
" Ma."We hear him call to Thandi and he keeps calling as his voice gets closer. I feel myself tense up again.
"Try to relax." Thandi says with a hudshed voice then she raises it "In here." she calls out to him.
