I'm Yours | DARKNESS SERIES #6 ✔️

Chapter 173

One Week Later

Liam still hasn't come home. I haven't heard his voice in seven home days and I think I'm gonna die. I miss my king.
He texts me to let me know he's basically still alive but I don't need to know where he is. Why? Tbats dodgy within itself.
Where is he?
I walk into his office that's still unlocked and close the door behind me and walk to his desk. I need to find where he is. This is a joke now. He needs to come home.
I sit in his chair and open up his top right draw with my key. I find a letter and page from his journal torn out and that normally means it's gonna be given to me so I read it.

Here we are again.. The same fucking shit every year on my mums anniversary.. I get drunk as fuck and smoke so much weed its a joke. I do my regular dance with death hoping this time I'll make it to you mum. I'm alone without Stacey, I'm down and out, I'm so fucking sad and in too much pain to cope anymore.. I just want it all to end. I hate myself and who I am. I'm unlovable in every way, everyone would be better off without me, I'm just a fucking burden.. My mum is gone, Stacey.. The love of my life is with that fucking imbecile.. Ruby has Angelica and Jason.. I'm so alone and I cant bring myself to talk to anyone about anything.. I really want to but I can't form the words, I just shut down and put on this stupid fucking fake smile!! To make everyone else feel better.. What about me? I need to feel better, I need to feel loved and supported.. Fuck.. Why fucking me? I really do hate how I am.. Why can't I just be normal and open up about all of this.. That would be to fucking easy wouldn't it for fucks sake!!

I sit there with tears streaming down my cheeks. My baby, how could he of been feeling like that and I not even know it. I was there siting go him to come back to me while he was trying.. I can't.. How could he even think like this. I love him more than anything and I always have. I need to find my baby. And fast. Fuck! I rummage though the draw and find another letter and scan through it.
"I love you so much baby, I'm coming" I say holding the letter to my chest as I look for something, anything that will tell me where he is. I log into his computer and look at his history and see the cabin. That's where he must be. Please be there. I grab the journal entry and place it with the letter in my bag and grab my car keys out. I take my phone out aswell and call Becky as I lock up his draw with my key and leave his office locking up.
"Hi babe" she says answering.
"Hey, I'm heading out and I don't know when I'll be back, can you be in charge. Whatever they need just do OK babe" I tell her
"OK, are you OK babe?" she asks me ask I wio my calling tears.
"I'm OK, just look after the girls and tell Bonnie the same please" I tell her.
"OK hun, bye" she says abd I hang up as I leave the house. I jump into my Bentley and start it up quickly while pulling on my seat belt. I program the cabins address into my GPS and pull off listening to depressing songs. I need to find my king.

Pulling up at the cabin I see laims car and sigh with relief. Thank God.
I juno out gda bing my bag and run up to the door and push the handle hoping it's open and it does. I walk in closing the door and looking around to see Liam sat on the sofa with a bottle of rum in his hand smoking a blunt. He's definitely drunk. Great.
"Baby" I say walking over to him and he looks up at me and smiles.
"I've missed that beautiful face" he says smiling at me and I smile back.
"I've missed you baby, you've been gone for to long" I tell him sitting down next to him seeing his beautiful brown eyes. That's all I want to see right now.
"I needed to get away baby, please don't be mad with me" he says sadly and my heart breaks.
"Baby, I read your letters" I tell him and he looks at me broken.
"I'm so sorry baby, I was there all along and you was doing all that. I'm here and always will be, I love you so much you will always be my king" I tell him and he smiles a little.
"You'll leave me when I tell you" he says and swigs long gulps from the bottle.
"I won't leave you Liam. Are you not listening to me. I fucking love you weirdo" I tell him and he laughs and it's music to my ears. It's been so long since I've heard it.
"You promise, I can't loose you Stacey. I'll die, foreeal" he says and I grab his face and kiss him lovingly.
"I promise you with everything, I won't leave you Liam" I tell him and he nods and sparks his blunt taking a few hits leaving me waiting..
"I went to the doctors because I felt different" he says and my face drops. Please don't tell me your dying. Oh my god he's dying. I instantly start crying and he wraps an arm around me.
"I'm not dying baby" he says reading me like he always does and I let out the biggest sigh of relief, tears still falling. This is about the letter, the no kids problem? But thank fucking God.
"Basically, I found a lump and now I can't have any more kids" he says and swigs from the rum again. Over and over.. And over.
"Absolutely not!" I tell him grabbing the bottle and he looks at me.
"Baby, you told me not to long ago that you didn't want me getting pregnant anyways. This just makes it easier for that not to happen. It's a shit thing that's happening but it doesn't change anything. I love you no matter what" I tell him and he looks at me expressionless.
"Liam, I don't care. I'm not gonna leave you over this. Over anything but another women" I tell him feeling my chest tighten at the thought of him with someone else.
"That would never happen, it will only ever be you my queen, I love you so much" he tells me and kisses me forcefully. My kings back.
"I love you so much my king, you always will be. No slipping on my watch" I tell him and he laughs.
"Thanks baby, for understanding me" he says and I smile
"You said you would never run, why did you?" I ask him and he sighs smoking at the blunt instead.
"I thought you'd leave me when you found out. I felt less of a man and that you deserve better that that. Than me so I ran. I couldn't handle you looking at me differently. Retaking your heart would break mine. I didn't want to see it. I'm sorry my queen. So fucking sorry" he says and I climb into him straddling him and hold his face looking into his eyes.
"Don't hide from me Liam. I am your god damn wife. I see the real you always baby" I tell him and kiss him. I want my king.