you're just as far in as you'll ever be out

I need something to believe in

Hello! I am a long time "lurker" so to speak and finally decided to write my own story. This is obviously fiction and yeah...I'm not the best writer but I hope you guys like it anyway! :)

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"Have you told them yet? They're going to find out eventually."

Alana rolled her eyes and switched the phone from her left ear to the right one. She bent down on her knees and fiddled with the zipper of her over packed suitcase, doing the same thing to the other two surrounding her.

"No they won't," she protested quietly. "It's not like I'm pregnant. They're not going to notice anything."

"Are you sure?"

"Shut up," Alana couldn't help but laugh. "I'll be fine."

There was a sigh on the other end of the phone. Lucy had been Danielle's best friend since pre-school and the one girl besides her sisters Alana could go to for anything. "Just remember you'll be on the other side of the world, kid. I can't come rescue you then."

"I know," Alana whispered. She sat down on her bed and glanced around her room one last time. It would be at least three months before she'd see it again.

"And this is why I think you should tell your sisters."

Alana fell back on the bed and stared up at the ceiling. "They'll just...they'll just be disappointed. They're really excited about the tour."

"But you're not," Lucy pointed out matter-of-factly.

"I kind of am," Alana said, defending herself meekly. When Lucy snorted, she sighed and closed her eyes. "Yeah, I'm not. What am I supposed to do?"

Lucy paused for a minute. "Tell them what's going on."

"No!" Alana shrieked. She sat up and kicked the suitcases that littered her bedroom floor. "They're counting on me. I'll be fine...I'll..."

The thought of embarking on a three-month tour through Australia, New Zealand, and Europe made her want to breakdown and cry. The past year had been an absolute whirlwind and she could not get used to the constant attention. Her sisters, however, loved it. They loved playing live shows every single night. They loved meeting fans. They loved promoting their music on radio and TV shows. Even Danielle was a lot more comfortable with fame than she was.

"They're counting on me," Alana continued quietly when Lucy was silent on the other end. "It's too late to back out now. I can do it."

"Whatever you say."

An impolite knock on the door interrupted Alana's thoughts.

"We're leaving in two minutes!" Este shouted through the wooden door. "So hurry your ass up!"

"I'll be fine," Alana repeated for the umpteenth time. But the evident waver in her voice disproved her claim altogether.

"Talk to your sisters, Lans," Lucy tried one last time.

Alana just mumbled a goodbye and hung up. She slipped her phone in the back of her jean pocket and gathered her stuff. The suitcases weighed almost as much as her. How was she supposed to carry all of these?

"D!" she called out to her usually compliant sister once she opened the door. "Can you help me with my suitcases?"

Instead of Danielle, Este appeared in the hallway, clearly annoyed. "This is why you should have finished packing when dad was here."

"I wasn't ready then!" Alana pouted. She grabbed the heaviest bag but nearly fell into her sister when she attempted to lift it up.

"Give me," Este demanded with a laugh, taking the handle before Alana threw her back out. "How much can three pairs of shorts and a hair straightener weigh?" she said jokingly, dragging the suitcase out into the living room.